It’s fat-tastic!

The Mythical Boutique

June 23rd, 2008

I was at the Bubble Lounge with Anne on Friday night, dressed up in our elbow-length gloves, eating chocolate-dipped strawberries, and sipping champagne. (Tangent: I was wearing a dress with the totally wrong undergarments and felt very self-conscious about it. Of course it was also very low cut, and as I was walking to the Bubble Lounge, a car full of men drove by and literally yelled, “Woah!” Ace in the hole, baby.)

As we were lounging and sipping, we saw a plus-size girl in an awesome striped blouse. Anne stopped her and said, “I love your blouse! Where did you get it?” She hesitated for a moment and said, “Thanks! Er, I don’t remember. Some boutique.” She gestured off into the indefinite middle distance.

As she walked away, Anne turned to me. “That’s totally code for Lane Bryant.” I said, “I was thinking the same thing.” “I want to grab the back of her shirt,” Anne said, “And find the evidence in the form of a tag that says ‘Venezia.'” We traded stories about times we’d shopped at Lane Bryant and answered exactly the same question exactly the same way. (I would also sometimes say, “Macy’s” which does sell clothes in a wide range of sizes so is slightly more plausible.)

So, yes, I’ve been there, and so has Anne. Yet this maneuver is totally transparent, it turns out. First of all, what “boutique” caters to plus-size women? None that I know of. Second of all, who “can’t remember” where they got an item of clothing? I admit it happens occasionally, but for the most part? Oh, you remember. And it was Lane Bryant. Why is that such a punchline? Why can’t we proudly say, “Yes, I got this at Torrid!” Or the Avenue! Or Dress Barn! Or Lane Bryant!

So, plus-size women, has this happened to you, or is it just us? Do you shop at an imaginary “boutique” or do you shop at Lane Bryant?

Posted by mo pie

Filed under: Fashion, Personal

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77 Responses to The Mythical Boutique

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  1. Nomie, on June 24th, 2008 at 4:08 pm Said:

    I’m the girl who goes “I got this at Target! On sale! For seven bucks!” Because I am an inveterate bargain-hunter.

    However, I have also asked people where they get clothes – rarely strangers, but often people I only knew casually – because the more places I can shop at, the better. If I hadn’t done this, I would not have the cutest top I’ve ever owned – which came from Banana Republic, of all places.

  2. anzilove, on June 24th, 2008 at 4:11 pm Said:

    The clothes I have from Nordstrom (and other department stores) have all lasted considerably longer than clothes I have from LB, Ashley Stewart, Torrid, Dots, Rainbow, etc. The clothes from department stores tend not to fade or fall apart the way clothes from the other shops do (this is especially true of suits and other works clothes) and I think they fit much better than the cheaply made clothes. It is just something I noticed and find that spending a little more on a better piece is equal to spending less on multiple pieces that won’t last as long and dont look as good for as long. Just my experience. I will also note that I am an amazing clearance shopper and get super deals at the department stores–I never pay full price unless I need something ASAP for a particular function. Also, Marshals, Filenes, Nordstrom Rack, TJMaxx are also good options for department store quality for much much less.

  3. Cate, on June 24th, 2008 at 5:25 pm Said:

    I absolutely love LB. Their clothes fit me like a glove and I love their style in general.

    I still feel a little weird telling people that’s where I’ve bot my super cute outfit, but I’ve gotten used to it.

    It’s kind of funny to watch skinny people look at the mannequins in the window and be like “Oh, that is so cute! Let’s go in there!” and the other friend is like “that’s the fat chick store” and then the first one is like “oh. sad.”

  4. jabri, on June 24th, 2008 at 7:21 pm Said:

    Yeah, I do that too. Except that I work at that mythical boutique.People would ask me where I work and I’d be like ” a clothing store”… trying to be as vague as possible. Lately though I have been more truthful.

  5. jabri, on June 24th, 2008 at 7:32 pm Said:

    Lol at the skinny scurry!! So true.

  6. moxie, on June 24th, 2008 at 10:20 pm Said:

    “oh, some fat lady store. great, isn’t it?” is what i always say. cause it’s true and it takes less time than trying to remember where it came from.

    what i always loved was my mother sticking her lane bryant shopping bags inside other bags so no one could see.

    the thing is that being big is not a secret shame… and it’s really not a secret. might as well kick ass.

  7. Brittney, on June 24th, 2008 at 10:52 pm Said:

    Oh no way. I love talking about stuff I buy at Torrid. That place is my version of Toys R Us!!!!

  8. Ambular, on June 25th, 2008 at 2:57 am Said:

    It’s funny…I’ve rarely had people ask me where I get my clothes from…probably because I wear stuff most girls my age wouldn’t. Cute ‘Fosters Home For Imaginary Friends’ shirts from Torrid, anyone? Maybe it’s the bazillion band shirts from Hot Topic? But if someone does ask, I just tell them the truth because really, I’m so paranoid if I fibbed and said someplace other than where I got it that they would totally call me on it and that I would look completely dumb. But if it’s from Torrid, I can’t sing the praises enough because that store is like my heaven. Where else can I get alternativeish style clothes? Definitely not at Lane Bryant…besides, I REFUSE to pay 70+ dollars for a pair of friggin’ jeans. But that’s my two cents.

  9. Shade, on June 25th, 2008 at 10:05 am Said:

    I just want to point out that some people really DON’T remember where they bought clothes. I don’t. Honestly, I just don’t care enough about it to bother remembering.

    That said, I shop at Lane Bryant and Catherine’s.

  10. Micki Chevalier, on June 25th, 2008 at 1:09 pm Said:

    I used to get asked a lot about my clothes where I worked because I dressed better than I had to for that particular job. I had no problem with telling people I shopped at Torrid; a lot of my co-workers were plus-sized but hadn’t heard of Torrid because there is no store in our immediate area. I also got some good deals at Overstock.

    I don’t shop at Lane Bryant much because I find their practice of pinning back the clothes on mannequins annoying, as if their customers are under the delusion that they are not thin. I do like their bras.

  11. Just Me, on June 25th, 2008 at 5:17 pm Said:

    First of all…..DiosaNegra1967, where are the ‘tiques in Philly?!?!?! I’d love to find them!!! (hd_rulez@yahoo.com)

    If anyone asked me where I got something, I’d tell ’em, straight up. I find that Lane Bryants clothes flatter me. And if I happen to find something that actually looks good on me at Walmart (it only happened once or twice), I’d brag about that too.

    I am not a shopping snob!

  12. Liza, on June 25th, 2008 at 6:16 pm Said:

    Anyone ever hit Lee Lee’s Valise in New York? It’s pretty decent, if a bit expensive. And I wish it had a slightly larger selection. But I love that it exists (in the skinny capital of the world) and wish there were more.

    New York doesn’t have a Torrid. I’d have to take a train into New Jersey or Long Island to get to one. I miss it. I don’t get why the other two places I’ve lived in (Savannah, GA and Buffalo, NY) have it but frickin NYC doesn’t! Grrrrrrrrr!

  13. Liza, on June 25th, 2008 at 6:17 pm Said:

    I mean, “I wish there were more like it.” I was thinking faster than I was typing.

  14. Rhonwyyn, on June 26th, 2008 at 6:28 am Said:

    “First of all…..DiosaNegra1967, where are the ‘tiques in Philly?!?!?! I’d love to find them!!!”

    Yes! Do tell. I see lots of fat women walking around clothed, but WHERE did they get those clothes?

  15. Kendra, on June 26th, 2008 at 12:49 pm Said:

    Last night a non-plus-size friend complimented me on my jeans and asked where I’d bought them. I had a moment of “uh, crap,” then thought of this post, and said, “Lane Bryant!”

    Yay!

  16. there'smoretoyouthanjustfat, on June 26th, 2008 at 1:50 pm Said:

    I do shop at boutiques, online boutiques and brick & mortar boutiques and I do shop at Lane Bryant.

    And Torrid.

    And Macys.

    And Nordstrom.

    And Bloomingdales.

    And Saks.

    And Target.

    And Ebay.

    In fact, I shop absolutely anywhere I like as long as it fits and it’s cute I don’t give a hootenanny where it’s from or who knows about it.
    My wardrobe is enormous and fabulous, and I know where I got every single stitch of clothing from.

  17. Kristin H., on June 26th, 2008 at 9:17 pm Said:

    When someone asks me where I got a piece of clothing, I always tell them. I don’t skip a beat. I don’t look away. I don’t whisper it. I tell them. LANE BRYANT.

    And the thing is, a lot of Lane Bryant’s clothes are too big for me. There are times when I’m not quite a size 14. But screw it. I like it there and I can always find what I want.

  18. Adam G., on June 27th, 2008 at 2:23 pm Said:

    Men do this too. When people ask me where I got that shirt or this pair of jeans, I never say “Big &Tall!” or “Casual Male XL!” I always say something like “Oh, it was a gift” (from me to me) or “Oh, I can’t remember, I’ve had it for years” (two years).

    It’s one of the things that shames me the most, that I can’t just walk into Target or JCPenney’s and get a pair of 56/28 jeans.

  19. Abbasmurf, on June 30th, 2008 at 3:39 pm Said:

    Ha! I just call Lane Bryant “the big girl store” these days. Sometimes I call it “Petites and Up.” Almost every woman I know who cares about clothing buys their stuff at LB so I never feel self conscious. Sometimes I do around my mom, because I try to avoid any and all conversation about my size with her.

  20. Abbasmurf, on June 30th, 2008 at 4:02 pm Said:

    I wanted to comment, too, that I always feel weird in LB when there’s a skinny chick in there with a friend or mom. It’s almost the equivalent of being in the women’s locker room and having a man walk in all of a sudden. Ack!!! I feel like any men or skinny women in the store are observing me as though I’m wildebeast on the savannah. :D Then I tell myself that they’re probably just looking around because they’re jealous that they don’t have the hot ass curves to fill out the clothing.

  21. Bree, on July 1st, 2008 at 2:51 pm Said:

    When people compliment me on my clothes, I don’t hesitate in saying it comes from Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug, or any other store/catalog that caters to fat women. 90% of my clothes come from LB. I know they’ve been getting dissed a lot on the FA blogs, and despite some pet peeves I have with them (many tops I have to wear a cami with because they’re too low cut for my big cleavage, the obession with baby-doll tops and empire waists), they’re about the best around when it comes to fat chick clothes that are stylish and won’t break your budget (along with Fashion Bug).

    Look, I’m 5’9, 300+. There is no lying about me being fat. You can see me on the street and you’ll know right away I’m a pretty big gal. But there are times when I can find things at Wal-Mart, Target, and Kohl’s, Gabriel Brothers, Goodwill, and I still say where it comes from. A clothes snob I’m not. When you wear the big end of plus sizes, finding anything is a treat.

  22. Abbasmurf, on July 2nd, 2008 at 12:28 pm Said:

    Bree, ditto on the cami thing, and I hate tops that have bare shoulders or spaghetti straps. Am I supposed to wear a kryptonite bustier or something?

  23. Tabby, on July 25th, 2008 at 11:24 am Said:

    I love lane bryant’s clothes. I love it when I go out and someone smaller than me asks “where did you get that?!”. I think some of my family is amazed I can be a big woman and still find awesome clothes. My smaller friends wish some of my clothes could be found in their size. I had a great denim skirt she wanted so bad she had altered to fit her when I was done with it.

    Personally, I enjoy the atmosphere in their store. I’ve never encountered anyone being rude, staring at me, etc. It’s just when I leave the store, I have some people look at me or my bags. I don’t care. :)

  24. Di, on July 28th, 2008 at 4:24 pm Said:

    There are boutique stores for plus sizes if you look really, really hard. We have one in Minneapolis that is mostly consignment, some original called Plus Size Plum. There are also a lot of online boutique style businesses: Fashion Overdose, B&Lu, Jane Bon Bon – enough that there are around 600 unique stores that do offer genuine plus sizing in the search engine I sorted.

  25. spinstergirl, on July 31st, 2008 at 8:44 pm Said:

    Wow. I’m kind of surprised by all the snark. I’m glad that there are so many of you so comfortable with who you are, but there are some of us coming to terms. Cut the girl a break. Who knows why she didn’t want to give up the goods? Who cares? Hopefully Anne’s question will instill a little confidence in her, knowing that someone else thinks she’s got good taste as well. Individual style is an important thing, if I see something I like I’m going ask where someone found it. If they don’t want to share that’s cool, but I don’t really see the harm in asking. I moved to a new town and am in desperate need of a haircut. Everytime I see a cool haircut, I’m asking where they got it.

  26. Pingback: Big Fat Deal » Mimi Smartypants for President

  27. Jessamyn, on February 3rd, 2010 at 7:47 pm Said:

    I shop at Lane Bryant. Audibly. I only get embarrassed to admit to shopping at Wal Mart.

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