Best wishes with your new page and your beautiful new-ish baby.

As for maternity clothes, I had some pretty good success at JC Penney. I am about an 18/20, and their pants fit me just fine. I think you’d have a hard time getting into them if you’re any bigger though. And for shirts I’ve been staying away from the maternity section all together. There are so many cute flowing tops out there that work perfectly for a growing belly. And they’re often cheaper. And, EBAY! It has been a lifesaver. The auctions get a little competitive, but I’ve scored a few awesome things for not much money.

So sorry you’re feeling this way. I was never very skinny, but I learned to hate my body as a child.

Guess what? If you learned to hate your body, you can learn to love it. :-) My husband has helped me to become comfortable with who I am. Reading the blogs on the Fat-O-Sphere has helped a great deal, especially with giving me scientific data to defend myself to my family members who think that I am eating myself to death.

About the sex thing: It probably not your fault that sex has decreased. I say “probably” because every man is different, but I had to learn that when my husband wasn’t up for sex, it was because he was tired. Until last summer, he worked in a very labor intensive field, so when he came home, as much as he loved sex, DH preferred to crash and relax. Please accept what your husband is telling you about his lack of interest in sex. It’s not you, it’s him.

As far as your children go, the best thing you can do for them is to present a positive front. Don’t put yourself down in front of them. Always speak kind words, and avoid making comments on your body, their bodies, or others’ bodies. Model the supportive, encouraging, nourishing attitude that you wish you could have had in your formative years. “Fake it ’til you make it.”

Last but not least, come check out the Fatshionista community at LiveJournal. You do need to have an LJ account to post and to read some of the posts, but I feel that it’s worth it. I have been so encouraged by the active community that inspires me, challenges me, and accepts me. The fashion element is fun, too. Outfits of the Day (OOTD) posts are great, because i get to see other fat bodies like mine rocking clothing I never thought we could wear so well.

You’re on the right track, Mali. Keep researching, studying, and most of all, loving (yourself and others).

Best Wishes!!

I also like Lesley Kinzel’s blog, Two Whole Cakes; and Marianne Kirby’s blog, The Rotund. I’ve always gotten a lot of support and confidence from reading their writings. Fat Heffalump, written by an Australian size activist is also worth reading, as is Definatalie.com, another Australian size activist blog.

http://stores.ebay.com/SCECKERT-SILVER-COACH?_trksid=p4340.l2563

I just bought this bag from Duluth Trading – http://www.duluthtrading.com/store/mens/mens-accessories/mens-bags-briefcases/43129.aspx – it’s fire hose canvas with leather trim. It’s listed as a ‘man bag’, but I don’t find it to be heavily gendered. I love that the canvas is soft, so the strap is soft *and* has a leather shoulder pad that doesn’t slip on my shoulder. It’s a *really* long strap too.

Pockets? OMG pockets. Three middle zip compartments with pockets, It’s more than big enough for my Kindle, my knitting, my wallet, pens, phone, iPod, charging cords, a protein bar, whatever. LOVE this bag.