I need a cute crossbody bag for a reasonable price and can’t find any with long enough straps. I’m not a small girl and have boobs that are beyond big…lol. Have you found any place to get purses with longer straps?

I too love the crossbody bag, and I am always looking for one with long enough straps! I have a great one, but it’s from a chocolate shop in Vienna, randomly enough, and it doesn’t seem to be available in the U.S. So, does anyone have a great bag with long straps to recommend?

Now Jane Pratt has started a website, xoJane.com, and I am really digging it. Marianne Kirby (from The Rotund) and Lesley Kinzel (from Two Whole Cakes) are both writers there, and I think at least one of their other regular writers is plus-sized. That’s not just one token size ten contributor, that’s multiple people who are straight-up fat. (Back in the magazine days, there was one vaguely curvy girl named, I think, Katy (?), and I always felt like I could relate just a little bit more to her pieces.) The best thing about this is that THEY WRITE ABOUT ALL SORTS OF THINGS THAT DO NOT INVOLVE FATNESS.

Don’t get me wrong, they write great stuff about size issues. Lesley just wrote a piece called What’s Wrong With Fat-Shaming?, addressing those horrible billboards featuring sad-looking fat kids (I saw them in Atlanta last year, too, and I always wonder how the poor “models” feel, being plastered on a billboard, children, and being held up as some sort of example of what’s wrong with the world.) I also enjoyed her recent piece about Tim Gunn:

His comments are ultimately the same old body-loathing crap we hear all the time, wrapped up in faux sympathy, and therefore I must take issue with Gunn’s self-applied title of “advocate for larger women” as I believe his words do those women more harm than good. Especially when Gunn says of one woman on the new show, “…she’d been overweight her entire life and never known a normal, slim and sexy body.” (Emphasis mine.)

Check out the body politics tab for more (not just from Lesley, but from other contributors as well). But Lesley has also written about Downton Abbey and collecting things and tampons, and Marianne has written about eloping and fan fiction and Anne of Green Gables. I have no idea how the site works, but it doesn’t seem like “you’re our Fat Contributor, so please write about fat,” more like “you’re a contributor, please write about what interests you.”

I have to say tha I would love to see some more contributors of color, but the site is really doing something right by us plus-sized readers. So thank you to xoJane for having some real size diversity among your staff.

Until now, that is: one of the creators and stars of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Rob McElhenney, has gained 50 pounds for season seven of the show, which premiered last week. McElhenney, who plays Mac, says:

I never wondered what it would be like to have a fat character. That’s just mean and it’s not funny. Ultimately, what was funny to me was the abuse on one’s body. Mac was always talking about putting on mass, so he decided to put on mass. His vision was that when David was sculpted, they started with a big slab of marble and then he was whittled down. So Mac created himself a big slab of marble, but it turned out he was just a big slab of beef and never trimmed himself down. That to me is the funnier aspect of it. It stemmed from watching a really popular sitcom where the actors were better looking than five or six years before and I was like they’re better looking because they have more money, they are more famous, they have better makeup and wardrobe people. Our show has always been about deconstructing the sitcom and not creating likeable or attractive characters. It wasn’t just about weight gain, but about making myself look as self-abused as possible. I tried to look as ugly as possible.

(Two things about this quote that jump out at me: first, Danny DeVito is in the cast, and he’s not a thin guy, so they do have a “fat character,” although I can’t off the top of my head think about any weight-based jokes at his expense. I’m also not sure why having a fat character would be “mean,” but I’m guessing McElhenney’s referring to the type of character who exists for the sole purpose of having weight-based jokes made about them–a character trope with which we are all familiar.)

We started watching Sunny a couple of seasons ago (the gang’s musical, “The Nightman Cometh,” is endlessly hilarious to me), and the characters do and say wildly offensive things, making jokes about everything from crack addiction to rape. I do appreciate the fact that the woman in the group, Dee, is allowed to be just as offensive and horrible as the men, which makes it a rich comedic part for Kaitlin Olsen (who is married to McElhenney in real life). The question each episode seems to ask of the characters is “how low can they go?”

Glenn Howerton and Charlie Day, the co-creators of Sunny, were on one of the podcasts I occasionally listen to, WTF with Marc Maron. According to them, the characters–in their racism, sexism, and selfishness–are always the butt of the jokes, which is the source of the comedy. Howerton says:

Even with this year’s premise of Mac gaining weight, we are not making fun of fat people. We are making fun of Mac, because he thinks that he’s this muscle-bound person, and he’s done absolutely nothing in order to actually achieve that goal… this is not a person who is naturally fat, this is a person who is destroying his body under the delusion that he’s actually creating muscle… and that’s the joke, not fat people in general.

I’m glad Howerton makes this distinction, because I feel a lot of comedians don’t see a problem with making fun of fat people, and I appreciate (having seen the premiere and as a viewer of the show) that there’s more going on here. However, the “fat = funny” equation still strikes me as problematic. Alan Sepinwall, in his review of the premiere, calls Fat Mac a “sight gag,” and says:

Okay, first things first: major, major, major props are due Mr. Rob McElhenny for having the random but brilliant (if not necessarily wise from a personal standpoint) idea to put on 50 pounds in the off-season. Fat Mac is just a marvelous sight gag – in a way, it reminds me of that “30 Rock” episode where Jenna ate too much pizza over the summer, only, you know, real – that makes me laugh every single time I see him, while also standing in nicely as a commentary on the state of the gang. They’re getting older, and dumber, and sloppier – and in Mac’s case, fatter – and while another show might take this as an opportunity for personal growth, “Always Sunny” mainly just observes that they’re all getting too old for this shit, then has them keep doing it anyway, cuz it’s really really funny.

I don’t watch 30 Rock, so didn’t see the “Jenna ate too much pizza” plotline (which sounds like a dumb plotline, if I can judge merely based on the description) but I will be watching Sunny this season and am curious to see what others think. Here’s a preview of the show featuring “Fat Mac.” So what do you think? Do you watch Sunny, and do you think Fat Mac is funny? Can fat ever be funny?

Armed with a gift card in my hand and Nordstrom love in my heart, I headed to the nearest Nordstrom Rack, in San Leandro, California, to do a little shopping.

The first thing I noticed is that Nordstrom Rack does not exactly provide the full Nordstrom Experience. I’ve been to Nordstrom proper many a time, and have had luck finding gorgeous clothes and fancy party dresses. Nordstrom also has impeccable customer service, making it a joy to shop there. Not so with Nordstrom Rack, which is more like shopping at a really really nice Ross Dress for Less. But of course, the prices are a lot lower, so that’s the tradeoff.

Whereas the selection at Ross is hit-or-miss (and mostly miss), the selection at Nordstrom Rack is amazing. (And they are expanding their plus size selection and adding plus to more stores starting September 15.) They have everything from Coach handbags to Bliss products to (of course) designer clothes, with a nice selection of plus sizes (I saw sizes up to 3XL and 26/28). My favorite thing about the Rack is actually the shoe section, as they have a great selection of shoes that go up to Women’s 13. My time was a little limited since I had a B-A-B-Y with me, but I found a lot of stuff to try on in an effort to put together a fall outfit. I was looking for something to wear when I go back to an office job in October, with “comfortable” being my main criteria.

The first thing I found was a pair of black Not Your Daughter’s Jeans. I’ve never heard of this brand before, but they are super comfortable. I was in love with this pair of pants the minute I put it on (original price $138). I paired it with an oversized striped Blu Seven top ($48) that says “fall” to me somehow. I’m also super into stripes! I added a Calvin Klein cropped shrug ($58) as a nod to the crisp San Francisco weather, and a super long, jet crystal necklace ($78) from the Nordstrom Crystal Collection. The original total cost was $322; my total before tax was $125.88 (pants $37.97, top $24.97, shrug $19.97, necklace $30.97). I saved almost $200! That’s almost enough for one of the purses I was drooling over!

fall outfit , a photo by mo pie on Flickr.

I also had picked out a pair of gold shoes (original price $78; my price $38.97) in size 11 1/2 to finish off the look. However, there was a slight customer service snafu, and I didn’t end up getting them. I didn’t get bad customer service, exactly, it just wasn’t particularly good. I should say that the dressing room attendant was very nice about accommodating me and the stroller that I had, and a woman restocking merchandise was very friendly, but the checkout experience wasn’t great.

I had picked out a shoe and had neglected to go to the “shoe mate” window because A) the baby had started crying, and B) I had no idea how the shoe mate window worked. I asked if I could pay for the shoes and then go pick up the second one; this is apparently against policy (which I understand) but I was told I had to go to the back of the store to get the second shoe, wait in the line again (which had gotten really long) and then pay for the shoes separately. Since the baby was fussy and hungry by that point, I simply had to put the shoe back. I think if I were at regular Nordstrom, someone might have been willing to either run back and get the shoe for me, or let me skip the giant register line that I’d already waited in once. But again, it was my mistake, and their policy makes sense.

Overall, if you’re a fan of Nordstrom and a fan of saving money on expensive Nordstrom merchandise, it’s definitely worth poking around Nordstrom Rack.

Want to try Nordstrom Rack out for yourself? One lucky winner will receive a $100 Nordstrom Rack gift card to create their perfect fall look! Simply leave a comment telling me what fabulous fall piece is a must-have in your wardrobe. Make sure to leave your email address! Sweepstakes runs 9/15-10/31. Visit the Promotions & Prizes section. Official Rules.

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This giveaway is open to U.S. Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. You have 72 hours to get back to me, otherwise a new winner will be selected. Good luck!

I hadn’t seen the show, so I went and checked out some clips to get a feel for what it is like. There seems to be a range of fat experience here: some women have lost weight, some are dieting, some are very accepting of themselves. Many of them are matter-of-fact about their bodies, and have seemingly learned to blame the clothes, not themselves, if something doesn’t work. And of course, some are less confident, or apprehensive about the whole experience. Some hate trying clothes on; one woman admitted she hadn’t worn a dress in 20 years. The people helping them seem to be pretty positive and encouraging. (Although after watching a bunch of these videos, I still haven’t seem them find one dress that isn’t strapless, what is up with that.) (I also suddenly feel like getting married all over again in a giant white poofy strapless dress. Maybe I’ve watched too many clips in a row.)

So, have you ever seen the show? Do you have any advice for Laurie? Check out the clips below and let us know in the comments what you think. And good luck, Laurie! Let us know when the episode airs!

The premise was originally for a guy who gets his identity stolen by another guy, and it was written for Bateman and another actor. That changed after Bateman saw McCarthy’s scene stealing role in the summer hit Universal comedy Bridesmaids and he pushed for her to be the identity thief.

I have no desire at all to see The Change-Up, which stars Bateman opposite Ryan Reynolds. But McCarthy as an identity thief? This I totally want to see.

Via Monkey See.

Character: Megan, played by Melissa McCarthy

Credits: Before Bridesmaids, probably best known for Gilmore Girls and Mike & Molly, though she started off in the Groundlings. As far as her reputation among comics goes, this interview is worth reading.

Plot points: Megan is one of the eponymous bridesmaids in this female-centric, Kristin Wiig-centric comedy. At first you might think she’s the obligatory token fat bridesmaid that is going to be the butt of a lot of fat jokes, but she is really an astonishing character who basically steals the movie. (Or she would, if Kristin Wiig weren’t also so good in it.)

Stereotypes: The trailer had me worried. She’s the one most excited about the food at the Brazilian restaurant, and the first one to have gastrointestinal distress (though it eventually strikes everyone, her “I’m not confident which end that came out of” line is the one in the trailer). But ultimately, the character defies stereotypes: she’s smart, she’s independent, she’s rich, she’s brave, and she’s sensible. She is the character who (literally and figuratively) knocks some sense into our mopey heroine, Kristin Wiig, in one of the movie’s best scenes. She is honestly a joy to watch.

Sex/Romance/Attractiveness: In the sequence on the plane, she’s shown aggressively hitting on her seatmate (played by her real-life husband) and this sexual aggressiveness is played for laughs. There’s also a joke in which sex involves a sandwich, although by the time this joke comes up, my sense is that the audience is totally on Team Megan, and you’re laughing with her, not at her.

Fat jokes: There are a few (like “I naturally just don’t bloat” at the restaurant, which is meant to be ironic). Again, the reason I found them forgivable is because fat is not the be-all and end-all of this character, and most of the jokes involving her (and there are a lot) don’t involve fat at all. (My favorite one is probably her driving past Annie after the bridal shower, which I won’t spoil.) Admittedly it’s been a while since I saw the movie, so if I’m forgetting anything, hit me up in the comments.

The bottom line: McCarthy is basically playing the Zach Galafinakis part in this movie, and she does it brilliantly. There are a few jokes involving size or food, but Megan never, ever feels like a generic “fat girl” character. She feels like a real comedic creation. In that same interview, Rose Byrne says, “Melissa is nothing at all like Megan. That’s not hiring someone to do what they do; that’s a real performance. Melissa’s beautiful and feminine, but Megan’s tone—it’s almost like she’s a coach. There’s no doubt in her voice. For me a lot of the comedy comes from the tension between the wildness of her ideas and the way she would say them with such authority and confidence and speed.”

Rating on the offense-o-meter (10 being Norbit): 2

But how’s the movie?: You can probably already tell that I enjoyed it. In fact, I laughed so hard my water broke! (Okay, that’s probably not true, but my water did break in the parking lot right after we saw the movie. I was really glad we’d made it all the way through; it would have sucked to miss it.) Really hilarious, and a terrific rejoinder to the “women aren’t funny” trope. I can’t wait to see Melissa McCarthy in Bridesmaids 2. And congratulations to her on her Emmy nomination! Now that I know what McCarthy can do, I almost want to watch Mike & Molly.

Wilhelmina Anne was born at 11:43 pm on May 17th. (She was born via C-section, 50 hours after my water broke in the parking lot of a movie theater after seeing Bridesmaids.) (Which totally reminds me to write about Melissa McCarthy’s character in Bridesmaids.) She weighed 6 pounds, 14 ounces, and was 20.87 inches long. She is, of course, perfect! And that’s where I’ve been. Thanks for your patience!

She had been given free tickets to attend the filming of American Idol and was understandably excited. But 19-year-old Ashley Kauffman’s joy soon turned to upset on being told she was ‘too big’ to sit in the front row

There were two [female ushers] and one said: “Oh, I don’t want shorts in front,” about my friend,’…Then [the usher] looked at me and said: “Oh no, you’re too big, too heavy to be in front!” To make matters worse Miss Kauffman and the two other girls were then seated in the back of the theatre rather than directly behind their other friends…

She added that staff had seated two girls who were ‘super skinny and wearing little dresses’ in the front row where [she] and her friends would have been sitting.

Ashley says she is still going to support the contestants on the show, but is speaking out to “make sure it’s known how they treated me.” Good for you, Ashley, and I hope you get an apology–and front-row seats to the finale.

Via Rickey.org.

Hi there! I recently came across your blog and love it! Thank you so much for speaking up for the big girls!

My best friend is getting married in October and we are having a horrible time finding any actual stores that carry wedding dresses in sizes over 26. She doesn’t want to order one online and take the chance that it wont fit right (because you know, it’s bad enough you have no right to try it on in a store…when it doesn’t fit, you can’t return it). She wants to have the experience of trying a dress on in a store. She wants the fairy tale, I suppose, of walking in to a high end shop, being waited on and catered to. She wants a beautiful gown, not something my great aunt Mary wore to Easter dinner in 1983. As a women of size, people think that the size 37 on her tag means she’s willing to settle for anything.

After calling a few local stores and being told she’d “never find anything,” I vowed not to let this happen for her. However, after months of finding nothing, I am worried that these horrible people are right. We live in NE Ohio which is not the most progressive or fashionable part of the country. But we are willing to road trip to be able to give this awesome friend the experience she wants. Any ideas? Any and all help is much appreciated!

I hope you can find a place within driving distance; if it exists, I know the BFD readers will find it! However, I think that ordering dresses online and returning the ones that don’t fit may end up having to be the solution here. That’s also what I did for my non-traditional, non-weddingy wedding, and it worked out great! For a more traditional look, Igigi has lovely options, and they do let you return them. Readers also offered suggestions here a few years ago.

If that ends up being the case, who says your friend can’t have the fairy tale experience anyway? You can take charge of ordering and sending back dresses, so she doesn’t have to deal with any of it. Then turn your house into the dressing room–invite some friends over, set up mirrors everywhere, pour some champagne, serve some scones, fuss over her, take pictures of her in the dresses, vote on the best one. That sounds more fun to me than a bridal boutique, anyway!

Readers, any suggestions for boutiques and online retailers will be welcome, I’m sure. And Jessica, let us know what your friend ends up wearing!