Cheating On You
July 30th, 2007
With a guest post over at Elastic Waist. It’s about being a fat chick who works out, and an incident that happened to me at the gym yesterday.
I’ve learned to put a lid on the negative self-talk when I catch a glimpse of my fat rolls bouncing in the mirror. (I just shift my gaze to my thunderously bouncing breasts and assume everyone who can see me is in fact hot for me.)
See how I am tempting you to go read it, using my heaving bosoms as bait? (I once called big boobs a “fat chick’s ace in the hole.” Still true.) I hope you enjoy my tale of woe and triumph and breasts. Feel free to comment here or there! (Recommendations for a better sports bra in DDD size are welcome.)
Posted by mo pie
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that used to happen to me all the time–there was one evil machine at the YMCA where i used to work out (now i’m an all-outdoors worker outer)–it was the same thing too, the Precor elliptical with the arm movements. but, i actually just kept using it (not purposely, but if it was the only one that was free). no one really seemed to make a big deal of it, and i didn’t either. maybe people thought things and i was just oblivious–but F them. i have a right to work out, and those machines ask you to put in your weight when you first start, and when i put mine in it doesn’t tell me to get off, so F the rest.
(btw, sidenote: do you know of any blogs or discussion places for fat people who enjoy exercising? i was thinking today that i wanted to start biking, but wanted some suggestions from other fat bikers to know what bike to buy, whether fat people are allowed to bike in the US, ;) etc.).
Well I would suggest the Fathletes as a great place to start if you want a place specifically dedicated to exercise. And hey, I got my bike when I was at my heaviest, biked constantly, and never got arrested! So that was nice.
Oh, your guest post made me laugh in that way that makes you feel like you and the person who made you laugh could be best friends (I hope that sounded as complimentary as it was intended, and not freaky and stalker-ish). I am So. HAPPY. the machine made that awful Elliptical Death Knell noise for Cammy, too. Made my day!
As far as sports bras, have you looked at Title 9? They don’t really cover plus sizes terribly well, but they’ve got a few that go up to 42, and they carefully test all of their bras and rate them according to how well they “ban the bounce.”
HTH!
thanks for linking to elasticwaist.com. I now have another blog to subscribe to!
and if you ever find a good sports bra for the DDD girls (ones that actually support and won’t cause the dreaded uni-boob), Scream it from the rooftops and post it in bold for all to see.
I think they are also mythical creatures….
Oh my goodness, I’ve totally had the elliptical trainer make that noise too! And I had the: “Oh my God I’m too fat for this machine!” thought too… even though I almost certainly weigh less than many tall and muscular men I’ve seen using the machine. I’m glad the workouts are going well for you! And I don’t think there’s any such thing as a sports bra that will stop giant beachball boobs from bouncing… at least none of the ones I’ve ever tried on.
“giant beachball boobs”
I love it!
My giant beachball boobs were the reason I tried on 5 jillion swimsuits before my vacation…..
Did you use that “Ace in the hole” line in “tales from the scale?” Because i know I’ve heard it somewhere before and I LOVED that book.
Bras — I’m a 38DD and a runner, so I’m full of ideas on this one.
Enel bra — super expensive, but so good that it might actually strangle you until you get used to it.
Moving Comfort — mine is either the Fiona or the Mia, I can’t remember, but it’s like a normal underwire bra with a sports bra built in OVER it — so it’s like double bagging it, but the strappies are all connected.
I have a champion one that I also love… I can’t remember the style number but if you check out Champion’s website, it’s whatever super industrial / midevil torture looking device is on there. It is also underwire.
The mirrors are what used to keep me out of the gym and certainly out of yoga class… good for you for ignoring them. I was never able to do that very well.
Sigh. Unfortunately, I’m one of the fat chicks for whom the ‘big boobs’ rule isn’t the case. C-cup only here, despite my size. Have you ever tried to find a 42C bra? I think one manufacturer makes them. And to add insult to injury, most of my family is slim and big boobed!
I tried to add fake [/whinge] tags for the post above that didn’t work (read it as “real” html). Just read the above as sarcastically whiney, ok?
That bit about boobs being a fat chick’s “ace in the hole” thing doesn’t apply to me either. I’m the fat chick with no boobs, no ass, no hips, and lots of belly. Haha.
Yes, Jessica, that line was in Tales from the Scale! It sticks in my head because anne and I have had occasion to quote it at each other over the years. And Amy, maybe your sexy belly can be your ace in the hole!
Most fatties i have seen, i cant tell the difference between their boobs, rolls, thighs and butt. They just look like giant blobs of cookkie dough to me
Seconding the Enell rec. They’re $60 but built to last, and my girls do not move at all in my kickboxing or step classes in one of those bras. Title 9 has a similar bra, the Last Resort Bra.
And I’ll second the Moving Comfort and (sometimes) champion. But am i the only one who goes through sports bras quickly because I need tight ones to hold the jugs in place (jugs I will still have when I lose weight, I’ve had them since 5th grade) but because of that I pull the hooks and eyes out of shape?
Ah, that post rang so true to me in terms that, I feel like an athlete going to the gym and thought I was past self-consciousness, but this summer I’ve had 3 flat tires in as many weeks on the bike, only one of which was due to a piece of glass, and yes, I started to wonder aloud, “Am I just too fat to be ona bike.” The sweet boys at the bike shop assured me, no, these things just happen, but I still wonder if thin girls get three flat tires in as many weeks.
Oh, the Last Resort Bra is marketed as butt ugly, but I’ve used it as a sports top on hot summer days. Good for a 6 am run. Does what it says by pretty much binding those things in place.
Oh, jn hn jnj, I bet you think you’re really clever and intimidating and have gotten us all down. Guess what? We all are just hurumphing at you.
The thing that got me into the gym and keeps me going to the gym is defiance. I go to a swanky, shiny, fancy gym in Chicago’s River North neighborhood and I’d say I’m the biggest chick there. When I joined in June 2006, they worked me hard to get a personal trainer (not for $6000 a year, but thanks) and the tone was definitely “well, if you don’t get a trainer, you won’t keep coming here”. I’m still there, still going 2-3 times a week, and I’m doing eight miles on various machines (elliptical, bike, and treadmill combined) every session. I even had a slim-and-fit dude express admiration at how dedicated I am and how much more dedicated I am at going than he is. I just kind of panted, perspired at him and smiled.
Enell, hmm. I have the one I assume everybody’s talking about (built like a block and tackle) and while it’s good, definitely the best I’ve found…is it just me, or is it not THAT good? Their guarantee says “NO movement of ANY kind EVER or we’ll send your money back” (paraphrase but pretty close.) And that just ain’t so. I didn’t send it back because it IS the best bra I’ve found, but trust me, movement there is. Plenty of movement. And I’m a comparatively modest DD-DDD. I can wear their size 2. Why are they moving?? What will it take to keep these girls still? Moving Comfort, I am on my way to investigate your straps and wires.
I really need a sports bra that WORKS! I wear a size H bra and I guess big boobie girls aren’t supposed to work out or run or anything cause I can never find one.
Well, I don’t know about H, but I’m an E and I like Shock Absorber sports bras. I did consider Enell, but couldn’t find them offline and didn’t dare buy without trying on. Some styles go up to G. Not the prettier ones, alas. If you’re in the UK, Debenhams carry them (and so does BhS sometimes).
You don’t get NO movement whatsoever, but it’s definitely a firm hold and nothing hurts or feels uncomfortable. I once managed to pull a muscle in my ribcage by wearing an insufficiently retentive sports bra… that doesn’t happen with these.
And you can (mostly) wear them under a T-shirt without having a horrible silhouette.
The only sports bra that works for me is doubling up. Specifically, I use a cross-your-heart bra with soft wires next to the skin, and a Nike dri fit sports bra over that. I feel like a boa is squeezin’ me, but nothing moves.
I had great luck with Enell. I actually jumped up and down like an idiot in my front hallway when it arrived to test it out-no movement for my girls! I wore a size 4 at that time (40-DDD was my bra size then), and it worked like a charm. No pain in the boob area after some high impact cardio! Woo hoo! I am going to order another when I reach my goal weight (as others have mentioned, they aren’t cheap-I have to ship to Canada, so all told, about $90!)