Fat-Friendly Baby Gear
At the urging of various relatives and friends, I’m trying to put together a baby registry for Wigburg. You wouldn’t think that this would really be a fatty thing, but it turns out that for a few items, it is! So I figured: where better to ask about this stuff than BFD, right?
First question: do I need and will I use a rocking chair or glider? If so, is there one that you recommend as being sturdy and comfortable? Or should I just go to the… rocking chair store…? Yeah, I have no idea.
Second question: baby carriers and slings. My friend Jen suggested going to Babies R’ Us or what have you and trying on various types, which I think is a good idea; the other thing I know is that different babies like different carriers, and we most likely won’t know what Wigburg likes until Wigburg is here to express her preference. But is there a particular style of carrier that works or doesn’t work for a larger body?
And final question: diaper bags. I tend to like a messenger bag with a long strap, but occasionally when I order messenger bags, the straps aren’t long enough. anyone have one you like that has a nice long strap?
If there’s anything else that you’ve found to be a baby essential, fat-related or not, let me know! It’s a little overwhelming to stare at 20 different subcategories of baby stuff and figure out where to begin. Thanks in advance for your input!
Posted by mo pie
I really like the Babynest for the newborn stage…they have sizes that run big…I tend to be about 1X and I have big babies (9-10 pounders) and I still used a medium. I like the Ergo as soon as they are a little bigger, can hold their head up….The Ergo goes wide enough I just barely don’t need the extender but if you needed on you can get it!
Toy-R-us people have not the experience nor the training to instruct anyone on baby wearing. Call a local API or LLL or babywearing group and some of them will even lend you one to look at and try before you commit to buying one. My local groups have a carrier library and many woman willing to show you a number of the up close with their own babies in them…even before your baby comes out! I discourage all women (especially large women) to avoid the babyBjorn and anything constructed similarly because of issues for the baby and the wearer.
http://WWW.thebabywearer is a good place to look around at all the options.
Diaperbags are overrated. Get a tote bag you like and put the junk in there.
Just in case you have not been there yet check out http://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/
Kmom (the site author) has amazing information and insight on all things pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding especially for plus-size woman…PLEASE read it!!!!
Babies “R” Us does sell an awesome extra wide glider that I’ve been using now for well over four years and is doing great (um, one bit of advice? put a towel or two on the seat the first 2-3 weeks after the baby is born? cause I didn’t? and the chair’s only flaw involves a stain).
I loved my Hot Sling when she was teeny, I just got the largest size (I’m generally a 26/28 or so and blew up a quite a bit more at the end of my pregnancy because I enjoy fun complications, particularly fluid-related ones). After she outgrew that, I liked the Mei Tai sling which I bought from http://babyhawk.com/ with the extra long straps. This worked for me because it could be used on my back or front, and my husband could wear it too.
I do like diaper bags, because I enjoy cubbies and diaper bags are full of cubbies. I found plenty with a long enough strap, but also the “dad” diaper carriers always have nice long straps and come in my preferred plain black.
I second the advice above about Plus Sized Pregnancy, and yeah, I found breastfeeding challenging not only for the regular reasons but also cause my boobs were quite literally five times the size of my daughter’s head. After much trail and error I settled on the football hold, helped by a large pile of pillows on my side. :D
Anyway, feel free to reach out. :D
Pingback: Tweets that mention Big Fat Deal ยป Fat-Friendly Baby Gear -- Topsy.com
I used my glider quite a bit, I would definitely recommend one that is comfy because I often fell asleep breastfeeding in the middle of the night in mine! I used a moby style wrap for when my pigs was little, I really liked the versatility, I think the sizing would be not too bad, I could wrap it twice and wear an 18 for the most part- so hopefully it would fit a large range of sizes. I second the other comment on finding a cute bag that you like and using it- I actually used a range of bags, a little one for when pigs was little that only held a diaper or two and the nursing cover, and now that she is over a year a ‘knitpicks’ bag that holds diapers, spare clothes, a cup and some food.
I also found for babywearing finding a neat local store that supports babywearing is awesome because they will help you get fit properly and that makes a huge difference in comfort. :)
Not a mommy, but I’m a doula, so I see this stuff all the time. I concur with Naomi that diaper bags are overrated- in fact, I think most baby gear is overrated. Changing tables, “travel systems”, “brain-enhancing” toys.. totes silly. Your baby gets the most out of being with you. You’re her favorite toy and her favorite place to be. Anyway, I have seen slings of all types used successfully by fat women- my favorites are the sturdy backpack-like ones, either front or back, and the simple fabric slings. I’ve had a lot of experience with the Infantino, too, and while it was a pain in the butt for me, my godson LOVED it, so.. YMMV. In general, for newborns, I’d say pick something cheap and that holds the child closely- babies do have opinions, but sometimes those opinions are shaped by what they start out with. Newborns in general like to feel wrapped up tight- really tight- close to your body.. it’s a baby thing. But definitely talk to other moms and try out different things before investing a lot of cash in anything.
Yay! I’m really happy for you!
I just had my first baby 2 weeks ago and I found Consumer Reports to be really helpful in deciding what to get/register for. They have a list of the essentials for newborns and what you should look for in those essentials, as well as a list of “nice but not necessary.” They also discussed what things aren’t necessary/helpful (like electronic brain enhancing toys). They have ratings for things like car seats, strollers, and cribs (as you would expect). They did state that you really can’t use the baby carriers until they are old enough to hold up their heads on their own AND to avoid slings with a single shoulder strap, as babies can suffocate in those.
I also recommend that you register on-line if possible for baby items, as it made it a lot easier to pick out and compare items (my spouse and I were able to do our registry from bed).
Congratulations! I hope that you feel better soon- I remember how difficult it was to feel like I had the flu for several months.
Sorry for my choppy sentences. Ergo carrier with infant insert, which I believe is separate. Babies r us isn’t the place to go for carriers as mentioned above. I agree with the above post resources at thebabywearer.com
I wish I’d had a lazyboy recliner when my son was an infant. You can breastfeed, the stretch back and take a nap yourself! It would have been super to have an adjustable back.
My favwe bag was a diaper backpack, but as others have said, why not just use the real thing? I didn’t like mssgr bags because they cut through my ample girls and just look weird. Plus you might not want that strap there with baby up front as well. My strategy for hands free was carrier and babe first on front, then backpack on back. What fun!! Sometimes I want to do it all again!
One of the things we were looking for in carriers was ease of changing the sizing, since my partner is much smaller than I am. Also, we are cheap. We got a lot of mileage out of our Moby wrap (not as hard to figure out as you might fear and great for teenytinies) and a mei-tai style carrier (we got the Infantino Wrap & Tie off of Kids.Woot for very little cash, best once he got a little bigger).
As far as a glider goes, I don’t think you strictly need a glider but a place you can feel safe sitting while holding the baby and sleeping is essential. We got a leather rocker/recliner off of Craigslist and used a small exercise ball instead of a footstool for rocking.
I agree you don’t really need a diaper bag, but we got one and I’m glad we did because we are not so organized and it helped us have a default place for various baby-on-the-go items. We have a Diaper Dude messenger bag, and the straps are long enough.
Clearly I am in a minority here, but I never really understood what I was supposed to use a glider or ricking chair for. I nursed my son until he was two. When he was a little baby we sat in an armchair, as he got bigger we sat wherever.
I used a Jeep brand baby carrier – it was very unisex looking, and I suspect designed so dads would like it. That also meant it ran bigger. My husband actually mostly used it because we were usually together when we went out with the baby and he’s better at carrying stuff than me. He really treasured his role as “baby hauler.”
I had a really basic Dickies messenger bag we used as a diaper bag – now that our son is five it’s my laptop bag.
In generally, if you go with the unisex stuff, it’s sized bigger to account for men, and has the added bonus of not being cutesy.
I wish I’d waited until after my son was born to buy stuff. There were a lot of things we didn’t need. We could have just bought things when we found out we needed them.
Oh – and my tip to all new breastfeeding moms: learn to breastfeed lying on your side. You can’t sleep that way but it’s really nice to lie down when you’re exhausted.
We really liked the Wilkinet baby carrier: http://us.wilkinet.com. It has no buckles, just long fabric straps which you tie in a bow, which makes it extremely adjustable.
I FLOVED my babyhawk baby carrier (it is a Mei Tai type of carrier). I was about 225 when I had Bella and I had no problem with the straps fitting. Bella was a preemie, and the babyhawk allowed me to do skin on skin carrying, which was great. I highly recommend them.
I’m a big mama myself, and you are SO right that baby gear is not one-size-fits all! Here are a few things that have worked for me:
Diaper bags:
I love my Skip Hop duo–it is the best diaper bag I’ve ever had, and I’m a total bag fiend so I have quite the array. Very long adjustable messenger bag strap that is easily removable so you can quickly affix the bag to your stroller. Love it! (Oh, and I’m also 5’11”–so if I say the strap is long enough, it’s LONG.)
It’s true that you can go without a diaper bag, but I really think the way they’re designed makes using them when you’re out and about with your baby such a boon. It’s SO much easier to find things when they’re in compartments designed for that purpose.
Glider:
I loathe those typical Dutailer-type gliders, we went with an upholstered rocker instead so it would eventually fit nicely in our living area. Just try out a few and see what feels good…and don’t limit yourself to Babies R Us and the like–ours was from a baby speciality store and was actually much more affordable (even custom-ordered with the fabric of our choice) than many/most of the gliders you’ll find in traditional baby stores.
Carriers:
It’s all about the boobs. Mine get in THE WAY. I had a lot of success using the Maya Wrap ring sling (they come in sizes, S – XL, I’m currently a size 22 and the L is plenty big enough). I used it “kangaroo style”, though; with the baby upright and belly-to-belly with me (like you would do with a bjorn, etc.).
I also have a Wrap n’ Wear, which is designed like a Moby Wrap but is of a gauzy fabric. Since it’s totally adjustable, it’s very size-friendly. That said, I have always had trouble getting mine to fit “just right”. But that is likely user error. :)
I have an Ergo, and it is great, in theory. They offer a waist extender you can order (I did) so it will fit your waist better. Sadly, my boobs have kind of always gotten in the way with wearing the baby on my front–I plan to try it again this spring with my daughter on my back. So, YMMV with the Ergo.
I haven’t tried it, but I read a lengthy recommendation for the Babyhawk Oh Snap written by a big mama who had the same complaints about the Ergo as me and said the Oh Snap was perfect. Can’t comment myself, though.
Best of luck with selecting your fab baby gear!! It’s so much fun.
The diaper bag I got was from the Carters store. It looked like an ordinary bag but had nice things like a diaper changing pad included, as well as a holder for wet clothing. I wear all my bags messenger style, so this took the place of a purse when we would go out for about 18 months. It was nice having only one bag. I still have the thing and will probably use it for a second, should we have one. The strap was definitely plenty long enough for me and I didn’t even have it extended all the way.
If you’re planning to breastfeed (and I hope that’s the case), a glider rocking chair is fantastic. I suppose it’s fantastic too, even if you’re not breastfeeding. It’s very soothing to sit in for both you and baby.
Another breastfeeding gizmo that’s useful is a “donut” pillow that goes around your waist. Baby rests on it while feeding. I don’t know whether this type of pillow comes in different sizes. You’ll have to do some research.
Babies are wonderful. My first just celebrated his 18th birthday a few days ago. I still remember those first days as if it were yesterday.
Best of luck!
Also, if you like a nice wooden rocking chair, as kitsch as it sounds, check out Cracker Barrel, if you have one nearby. They have great solid wood rocking chairs for around $120.
I agree to just use a bag you like instead of a diaper bag. I personally prefer a back pack because then you can use it later on when you are following the kid around a playground, and it stays out of your way, but Jeremy always uses a regular old Timbuk2 messenger bag.
If you guys lived here you could go to Goore’s and test out one million or so gliders. I just used a rocking chair.
A simple cloth sling.
Really truly. I got a large sized sling and carried my kid around until she was two years old in that thing.
It takes a bit of getting used to and the kid will fuss a bit at first…but it’s a real help, especially if you plan on breastfeeding.
It’s versatile enough that I rarely even needed to have a baby bag.
I’m a 22/24 and the mother of a 23-month-old and a 5-month-old. I think that a lot of baby gear is overrated and unnecessary, but there are some things I would not have done without:
1. I always wanted a fancy glider, but could never seem to settle on one that was good quality and didn’t look like baby furniture. I nurse my babies on our couch a lot. I think if you find one you like you should go for it.
2. I love love love our Moby Wrap (fits me and my husband). We also have an Ergo carrier (the Sport version, which gets less hot) that we use for the toddler. The waist extender is cheap and a big help.
3. I relied on a series of diaper bags before we had #2, but once we started hauling schwag around for two babies, I got serious and bought a DadGear (name = ugh!) brand backpack diaper bag. It has all sorts of handy nooks and crannies but doesn’t scream “Diaperbag!” If I were rich, I’d have bought one of the Queen Bee Creations baby bags. I love their purses and have two, but I couldn’t justify $180 for something that carried shitty diapers around.
My only other “must” was the the My Brest Friend nursing pillow (positioning is hard at first, and this saved me–also has a handy pillow for Iphone/remote/pacifiers)
Mazel tov!
Hey Mo,
I would really recommend you visiting queenbee.com. They have a baby like called chickpea that carries baby bags and such. They handmake them here in Portland, so they might be able to make longer straps if you ask.
I’ve got an almost-4-month-old so I’ve been through this game very recently!
My experiences:
Personally feel that gliders/rockers are overrated for nursing. I’ve had better luck with a comfy recliner, especially for those early exhausted days. (Also, look into “laidback nursing” – awesome for mom and baby comfort, especially for large chests! I didn’t do it all the time but was very comfy when we did)
Other nursing stuff – Boppy was a pain and their “stretchy middle” wasn’t nearly stretchy enough. “My brest friend” is awesome – firmer, flatter, and buckles on, plus lumbar support. My husband tried it on for me and the strap fit around his 54-inch waist (though only just). The nursing tanks from Target are nice and thick and LONG! Also, the “aden and anais” brand muslin swaddle blankets at target are amazing as lightweight nursing covers… they’re big enough to cover my belly flab!
Carriers – moby is definitely awesome for the early days. Now that my daughter’s nearing 4 months and trying to look around, I’m loving a mei tai (I’ve tried both catbirdbaby and babyhawk and they’re awesome. CBB has much longer straps. FYI – the infantino one is a lot cheaper for a reason – it doesn’t meet industry standards for materials or construction, and is generally not recommended).
We’ve got an Ergo but it just fits me even with the extender strap; does not work for my husband (at least on the front – will probably try again when she’s big enough for a back carry… the problem is that his belly fills the carrier and there’s no place for the baby!)
We’ve got a couple diaper bags – my absolute favorite as far as strap length is a $20 Graco one from walmart! It’s got kind of a “bowling bag” styling – short tough handles plus a long shoulder strap. My husband can strap it on cross-body messenger style with no problem, or it’s easy to grab the short handles or loop them over my wrist when needed. Actually, it’s my favorite in general – lots of space (we use cloth diapers and can fit 8-10) and seems sturdy. Plus it’s black and lime green – not pastels and baby animals!
FYI – babies r us might work for trying out rockers/gliders, but I would see if you have a cloth diaper/natural baby store in your area to try out carriers – the ones at BRU aren’t great.
First of all, congratulations on little Wigburg! Completely awesome. I’m not a mom so can’t really vote on the necessity of diaper bags, but I have owned a Queen Bee regular messenger bag and they are well-made and very cool-looking. As other posters have noted, their Chickpea line focuses on baby stuff. Yes, they are spendy, but they do have online sales so you might luck out there. The strap on my bag was pretty long, too.
I do think there is some advantage to a diaper bag in that I understand they are lined to deal with wet clothes and spills. But again, others with real-life baby experience are better equipped to weigh in on that.
Maya wrap, size large. Best sling out there and fits both mama and dad, no matter what size they are. Plus, it folds up small and can fit in whatever is desgnated as diaper bag.
DH prefers a backpack style bag, I had a big diaper bag that stayed in the car most of the time for big problems and just carry a plastic bag with a couple of diapers and a packet of wipes in my purse. Oh, and an extra outfit with another bag for accidents.
Diaper bag: Definitely the Skip Hop that attaches to the stroller. It is the best thing I found. If you try to put other bags on there, they hang funny, this one fits just right on every stroller I’ve tried.
Carrier: I never found anything that worked well with me first pregnancy. The best I got was the Ergo, with the waist extender. It fits more on your hips though, not around the waist.
Nursing Pillow: I LOVED something called the Big Vee, which is now called The Original Theraline Maternity & Nursing Pillow. It is very adjustable, and HUGE. I was able to position ourselves exactly as I wanted, the other ones I had that were more pre-formed would pop out from under him and make everything messy. This one has microbeads in it, and stays where you put it. I am planning on buying a second for my soon to be born second boy. The pillow was leaking the little beads so we had to get rid of the first one. :( As far as where to nurse, I nursed most comfortably on the couch, with pillows behind my back as well, to get myself into a comfortable position.
I third (or fourth or fifth?) the recommendation for the Skip Hop bag, although I will warn that the one I had did not wash up as nicely as I hoped it would.
I am a big geek for slings and have used almost every different type. First, stay far far away from any baby carrier available at BRU. Seriously.
Pouch slings–I tried them with both babies and I never found one I liked. My issue is that they have to be sized to fit, and my weight fluctuates a lot, especially right after having a baby!
Ring slings–The positive is that they are extremely adjustable. I never found my sweet spot with them, though. They just weren’t comfortable. One negative is that it is a one-shoulder carry and does not distribute the weight as well as a two-shouldered.
Mei tai–Loved them with my first daughter. Babyhawk is a good one.
Wraps–Got the wrap love with my second. I really, really love the Gypsy Mama Bali Baby stretch. Same idea as the popular Moby Wrap, but a bit of a step up. It has two-way stretch which makes it a little more supportive. Very cozy.
Ergo–This is the carrier I used the most. I used it with my older daughter until she was about 2.5, and I know people who have used it until their children were 4+. I use it almost daily with my 1 year old and so does my husband. Front carry and back carry. I need the waist extender, he does not. They are frequently on sale on babysteals.
I agree with Target nursing tanks if you can fit into a XXL, which I can at size 22, but I am small boobed so? Milk Nursingwear is the best-fitting and best constructed nursing shirts I know of, although I am ultimately the most comfortable in my own regular shirts. Took me a while to work that one out.
I do think less is more as far as baby stuff goes. That being said, I came to that conclusion after trying a bunch of stuff the first time around and realizing I just didn’t need that much. I am definitely more of a minimalist than some moms out there. My sister is pregnant with her first and I told her, “Look, when you ask me for recommendations I am almost always going to tell you the most basic, least-blingy thing there is because I have tried it all and decided most of it is crap. But you’re a first time mom, so if you want bells and whistles, go for it.”
Seriously, though, consignment is where it’s at. The big sales held in churches with moms of multiples or whatever. In my area (Atlanta metro) there are literally dozens every single weekend in Jan-March and Aug-Oct.
Good luck, and keep posting on your pregnancy! Fat pregnancy FOR THE WIN.
Definitely the babywearing group/forum idea; Babies R Us is pretty useless.
We had/have a Dutalier glider and we still use it every day for reading. Molly had colic and got rocked to sleep in it every night for over six months. I used to sit it in while pumping because the footstool was the perfect height and also rocked.
I tried using a regular bag as a diaper bag and it did not work for me. I was forever dumping out all the contents or spending ten minutes digging down to the bottom looking for whatever I wanted, which was always on the bottom. I loved the organizational qualities of my diaper bags. I liked the Lexie Barnes bags and the Skip Hop bags. The LB bags aren’t cheap but you can get all kinds of awesome used bags (and advice) on the Yahoo Babybags group. Those women are bag-crazed (and I do mean crazed) but man, do they ever know their bags.
Just a general baby gear recommendation: always think about how easy it is to clean whatever you get. You also don’t need a whole lot of stuff. My least favorite are those poofy “safety” covers for high chairs at restaurants and shopping carts. Awkward, unnecessary, and rapidly become full of germs themselves!
Beat high chair (you’ve got a few months) is the $20 IKEA hard plastic one (with $5 tray). Cleans in a snap, works well, dirt cheap. The big expensive ones are a real pain, bulky and hard to clean.
I had a recliner with my first child and it was heaven. I could rock AND sleep in it. It was money well spent. Before my second was born, we got a Lane chair-and-a-half, which has also served us well. You can cuddle side-by-side with your kids when they’re not cuddly babies anymore :)
Also I never found a better, more convenient diaper back than the Land’s End backpack. Plus once it’s not a diaper bag, it’s a plain old backpack. I assume they still have them.
It’s been years since I had my kids, but some things still stand out!
1. washable is important. I mean, really washable! think about this when you are looking at diaper bags
2. the diaper bag must be something the dad will carry without embarrassment. My husband already felt awkward about toting baby stuff (loved the babies, but felt weird about diapers, etc.) – our navy blue no-nonsense look diaper bag made it ok to carry. no flowers or little storks.
3. all those nursing helper pillows were totally useless for me. Ditto the rocker (nice, but not for nursing). I found that nursing in bed (especially at night!!) or on the sofa was easiest. A pillow from my bed under my arm and over the armrest of the sofa was perfect. And I found that regular loose shirts paired with a nursing bra were much less revealing when nursing in public than the “nursing shirts”.
3. Never leave the house without a plastic bag or two. You never know what you’ll need to put in it! (and this is true for years!)
good luck!! mostly, just try things out for you. So much of this is so personal and has to do with how you are shaped and how you like to sit or stand.
4. Oh, one more thing! many of those baby carriers cannot be put on by yourself. With my first child I just bought a front pack from a store kind of randomly, and could only use it when my husband was there to help me put it on. i.e. I almost never used it. With my second, we bought a Baby Bjorn (sure there are lots of other great products now). It could EASILY be put on with an infant WHILE keeping track of a toddler. Key!
I have trouble with my shoulder so never tried a sling.
best of luck!
have fun!
Above all, keep in mind that the purpose of maternity stores and maternity aisles isn’t to provide you with the things you need, but to sell you stuff.
I use a regular Boppy. It’s “broken” in the middle and I won’t be passing it on, but it works for us. Before I got a Boppy, I just used an old wedge-shaped foam pillow. Nursing with feet up and a cushion under the baby makes sitting up late with the baby much easier.
I also have a sidecar bed wedged securely next to my side of the bed. It has a firm mattress on a level with the big mattress. My husband custom built it; if you aren’t handy and you don’t know somebody who is, ask around for the best sidecars people have used. I nurse my babies lying down whenever possible and the baby sleeps with us for part of the night. This really helps me sleep better!
Due to physical problems, I couldn’t sling any of my babies for long. I have worn out several strollers. If you get a stroller, look for one that will:
*Fold up and fit into the back of your car.
*Work with or without the baby bucket, so you can keep using it as the baby grows.
*Recline if the baby goes to sleep.
*Carry A LOT of stuff in the cargo basket.
*Turn easily with one hand (check the display model).
*Clear basic outdoor obstacles, such as a few inches of snow.
Get a thick, water-resistant blanket and throw it over the stroller for cold or wet days; secure it with clothepins or balloon clips. A double-layer tied polyfleece blanket is ideal.
Hmmm, sorry I missed this post when it came out. Let me add my belated two cents.
A lot of stuff is very much parent-preference. Very much YMMV; you’ll figure it out as you go. Don’t stress over it too much.
Personally, we loved a really comfy recliner for nursing. Bought one at Lazy-Boy and it was well worth it because we spent so much time in it. However, it was sized more for my husbad and so we eventually got a really good one that fit ME (this one was a recliner with a gliding motion). Definitely worth it. Even now that I don’t have any nursing babies anymore, we still use both of these recliners, A LOT. A comfortable nursing chair is worth its weight in gold, although of course not strictly “necessary.”
Baby carriers are very much a personal preference thing. There are groups that run a baby-carrier lending library, where you can try on and even borrow different types of carriers to try out. They don’t always have them in plus-sizes, which isn’t as helpful, but you never know. See if there’s one in your area before you go out and buy much.
Personally, I’m a sling gal. Tried one with my first baby (a friend let me try hers) and I HATED it….but that was because it was totally the wrong size for me. Tried one that fit me better with #2 and it worked MUCH better. I like a hybrid sling, one with a padded shoulder and an open tail, so I had one custom-made for me. I also had a pouch made for me that worked surprisingly well.
Lots of people love moby-type wraps, and they are quick and easy to make. Myself, I never liked them. Hard to put on for me, and it hurt my back to try and get them on, but I know lots of people who swear by them. I’ve also heard great reviews of Ergo carriers or MeiTais, but I never tried one so I can’t say yay or nay for them. I have a FAQ on baby carriers for big moms on my website, which you might find helpful.
http://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/BBWBabyCarriers.html
We used the Land’s End diaper bag. We packed it with every possible needed item and kept it in the car, but had a couple of smaller versions we used for being on the go. I strongly advise keeping an extra set of clothes (or two) for baby on hand at all times for blow-outs, and also an extra shirt for you. Listen to the voice of experience on this one! :-)
Most baby “stuff” out there is not that important….mostly a way to get parents to shell out a bunch of extra money. However, I think a good diaper bag, a good baby carrier/sling, a good nursing pillow, good nursing bras, and a comfortable nursing chair is on the top of my must-have list.
My top advice is to trust yourself. You’ll develop your own preferences and figure out what works best for YOU as you go. Best wishes!
As you’re identifying everything you want, consider creating a gift registry at http://www.alternativegiftregistry.org/. A friend of mine did that for her baby last year, and I really liked it. You can list items from all sorts of stores, but you can also ask for homemade or gently used items. Very eco-friendly. :-D
I don’t care about the size, if it is comfortable then why should not buy one, it depends on your choice.
I reccomend a glider, or even a rocking recliner. Something big and comfy.
After Parker was born I pretty much LIVED in the recliner in his bedroom, I could sleep in it holding him if I had to. I often had to. lol
The diaperbag I use I actually got free from my OB. It came full of baby samples. Its almost like a messenger bag, but a little smaller, with a nice long handle. All the actual Diaper Bags were too big and clunky for my liking.