Not All Armor Is Chain Mail: Dressing Your Best For Uncomfortable Gatherings
Well, would you look at that, it’s suddenly the week of Thanksgiving here in the US. You know what that means, right? Parties. Dress ups. Cocktail hours. Company shindigs.
And the downside to all of that glam? The family gathering.
Some of us are lucky enough to have happy families, supportive and warm loving families that do not thrive on dysfunction and backstabbing (and to you I say: what’s that like? And also, can I pet your unicorn sometime?) but I for one do not. It’s totally the wrong response, but I find that I do much better mentally if I am wearing something that I absolutely love and that I know looks fabulous on me. Pants that pull or shirts that pucker are not allowed! To risk the chance of absent-mindedly plucking at your clothing in a way that would be misinterpreted as weakness or insecurity will certainly give some well-meaning relative an opening to corner you just to remind you that you have such a pretty face if only you’d do something about –you know. UGH!
For instance, I fell in love with this SWAKDesigns purple paisley number before it was even out and have been wearing the hell out of it for weeks*. I love it and it makes me feel like I can take on the world, even when I wear it to work with a modesty cami and a boring cardigan to deal with our unpredictable office environment. And while I was in San Francisco two weeks ago, I stopped into the Igigi office to chat with a friend and was literally stopped dead in my tracks when I spotted the Donna Corset Top hanging near their work area. Sexy and powerful and enough to give even Aunt Betty pause. I ended up being very crass and turning a social visit into a shopping one, but I was powerless to resist buying the Moda Italiana*: the wool is seriously like buttah. Clearly I’m not the only one who loves it, as they are nearly sold out but the maxi coat is exactly the same indescribably baby soft wool and also gorgeous.
I’m also keeping an eye on this cute sweater dress from Lucie Lu and I must have purple on the brain, because I keep wandering back to gaze at this wrap dress from Kiyonna. And anyone who haunts Fatshionista already knows about the English score ASOS Curve but this dress is either totally rock star or tragically marred by that fat girl dress shop need to slap shiny stuff on everything. My instinct is that it’s saved by the blend of sapphire and black.
What about you? What are your power outfits? Where should we be shopping for our next It Girl dress?
*This post is totally unbiased and was not compensated. Both the SWAK dress and the Igigi coat were my purchases and neither company requested a review. Additionally, neither I nor BFD received compensation or requests from LucieLu, Kiyonna or ASOS.
Posted by Weetabix
Filed under: Fashion
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That ASOS dress is sweet! But I hate the low dip in the back. My backfat is something I try to live with, but my boobs need holding up. Looks like a bar would be hard to wear with that dress, unless one wanted to go all “fuck it, here’s my bra ruining this beautiful dress” like Carrie Bradshaw.
I completely agree; when I go for interviews or ‘formal’ visits with family, I go for what looks good and makes me feel like a warrior.
One thing though: Your office suffers from a serious mental disorder? “…schizophrenic office environment.” This kind of phrasing belittles people who actually have schizophrenia and have to live with it every day through everything it throws at them. You may want to consider a different word in there that doesn’t stigmatize the non-neurotypical among us.
You’re right, that was careless writing. I’ve corrected the post.
That was wonderfully quick. Thank you!
As it turns out the one toxic person in my entire family is also the one who lives in my area (but luckily no longer in my damn house), so I spend Thanksgiving with my friends who know I can cook, and he spends his with his friends telling them I can’t cook.
Yeah, he never needs to sit down at my table again.
But yes, good clothes that fit well and feel powerful are mighty important to own and use wisely. I feel powerful in my tapestry boots and my gorgeous wine-red dress that flows perfectly on me and keeps my cosy in both hot and cold weather, depending on accessories. Also, hats are powerful on me.
Ugh! I am actually having a horrible time shopping lately. I went vegan and everything has wool in it that I peek at. It is making me a serious sad panda!
As if I didn’t have enough frustration trying to find cute clothes that fit me before. Argh!
Oddly enough, I wear maille for uncomfortable gatherings, but then I’m a maillemaker. I find a little symbolic maille, such as a necklace or bracelet, does wonders, plus I can show it off: “You like it? I made it.”
You have no idea how jealous I am that the dress you posted only comes in plus sizes. XO
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Loved the article. Thank you :)
Loved the article thank you :)
Give me a sharp, tailored jacket in a nice, bright color, some shiny accessories — and I can work anything!
I would love to be able to wear that dress. Sadly, I am one size smaller on the top than the bottom and, to top it all off (or not), I’m still an A cup.
Absolutely nothing on the market makes me feel like a warrior because nothing looks right on my body. :/