I had a fabulous time last weekend seeing Adam Lambert’s show at the Warfield in San Francisco. In fact, I was right up against the stage, so close that I could see the individual flecks of glitter on his skin. And other than a few songs that I don’t really care for, it was a terrific show.
I went hunting for videos of some of my favorite performances: “If I Had You,” “Sleepwalker,” and his slowed-down version of “Whole Lotta Love.” And I found this video! And it is great! And I will post it, because I love Adam Lambert! In case you hadn’t noticed! And then I will get to the point.
I decided to post the link to this video on my Facebook page, and once I did so, I saw the second part of the description of the video, which Facebook puts in automatically:
Taken by my sister at the San Francisco Glam Nation show at the Warfield.
Woman with the fat hands in front of the camera’s view, I want to smack you hard. Move them to the ground!
What a tiny little thing, the word “fat” in that sentence, the violent little message. But it stopped me short for a moment. After all, I was at that concert, right up front, probably waving my “fat hands” in the air from time to time, dancing and jumping around and enjoying the show. So I took it personally. At least for a moment.
I feel like there’s lots of little moments like this. Little things that are in and of themselves practically meaningless, certainly not worth getting upset over, and yet they accumulate. And over time, they add up to that sense of unworthiness and self-consciousness that we’re all dealing with and fighting against, simply because we aren’t skinny. Because we have “fat hands” or whatever and people—for some reason—hate us for it.
However, we also have the ability to think critically about stuff like this. We have this community and others like it. And I think that’s worth more than I often consciously acknowledge in terms of looking at a little comment and thinking, “well, that’s not right” instead of automatically internalizing it.
So tell me: have you seen any fat hate like this—any little throwaway moments—in the world around you lately? How did you handle them?
And can anyone get me Adam Lambert’s email address?
Posted by mo pie