BeautifulPeople.Com Kicks Off 5000 “Festive Fatties”
So, there’s a dating website called beautifulpeople.com, which describes itself as an “elite” website for “exclusively beautiful” people. This state of beautifulness is apparently determined by a HotOrNot-style online vote.
To become [members], applicants are required to be voted in by existing members of the opposite sex. Members rate all new applicants over a 48 hour period based on whether or not they find the applicant ‘beautiful’. Should applicants secure enough positive votes from members, they will be granted a full membership to the BeautifulPeople Network… BeautifulPeople does not define beauty it simply gives an accurate representation of what society’s ideal of beauty is.
Hmm. Okay, I guess it’s a website for people who enjoy the societal beauty ideal and prioritize that in finding a mate. Are these people superficial and shallow, or are this merely a way for people to date people within their physical preference, like a BBW dating site? (And I could have sworn we’d talked about BBW dating sites in the past, but now I can’t find the discussion…)
So that’s my first question. But here’s where it gets even more interesting: the site recently kicked off 5,000 people who had “let themselves go” (ugh, hate that phrase) over Christmas. Which obviously means that gaining weight automatically = a loss of beauty in the eyes of the “societal ideal” which obviously we already knew.
“We responded to complaints by moving the newly chubby members back to the rating stage. This is the same as having them re-apply,” said Greg Hodge, the managing director. Mr Hodge said the “festive fatties” had become an annual problem. “Every year we see that some of our members from western cultures eat and drink to excess over the holidays and clearly their looks suffer,” he said… In an attempt to soften the blow to those given the boot, the website sent details of fitness centres where they could work off their holiday excesses.
Robert Hintze, founder of BeautifulPeople.com, said: “As a business, we mourn the loss of any member, but the fact remains that our members demand the high standard of beauty be upheld. Letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model and the very concept for which BeautifulPeople.com was founded.”
My first thought was honestly, you reap what you sow. The entire idea of the website is to be “un-PC” and inflammatory and hate on fat people; if you join in the first place and start voting on people, you know what you’re getting yourself into. Which brings me to my second question: do you agree or disagree?
Thanks to @Splend via Twitter for the tip!
Posted by mo pie
Filed under: Question, Sex & Romance
My question is how do they know these people gained weight? The only thing I can think of is those people posted new pictures and/or wrote about said weight gain. Although I have a problem with him using fattie as a derogatory term I don’t have a problem with people dating within their zone. Some people don’t find extremely thin people attractive and some people don’t find extremely curvy people attractive. If they want to date based on looks alone then let them and I can find my deep meaningful connection without having to wade through the people only interested in the superficial.
You know, it’s really not worth the energy to get upset about this. It’s a website for shallow, self-centered assholes to tell other shallow, self-centered assholes how wonderful they all are. Can we not give them attention? Can we not say, “Oooooh, look what the club of shallow, self-centered assholes did!”? Because it just makes them look as important as they already think they are.
Fuck ’em.
We gots the beautiful people RIGHT HERE.
Peace,
Shannon
Jamie, I think they were people who had uploaded new pictures from the holidays.
I’m with Shannon on this.
Ditto Shannon. Though the other dating sites are still nearly as bad, with all the guys stating acceptable heights and weights for women they will talk to.
Publicity stunt. Best thing is not to discuss it at all.
I agree with Atchka… we shouldn’t be surprised when a site dedicated to the shallow and superficial acts… shallow and superficial.
If I knew anyone who was using that site and got kicked off and was offended by it, I probably would be unable to resist laughing at them. Because like you said, you reap what you sow.
It angered me when I read this post. What shallow people! Their statements make them sound uneducated and superficial. But then again, Shannon is right. Why should I waste my energy on them? They are not worth the anger because they are stuck in their own little bubble. Might as well put the energy into finding praising the real beautiful people.
Shannon speaks for me on this one.
I find myself reminded of an article by the late, great Molly Ivans. She was talking about some minor stupid celebrity kerfuffle that was taking over all the news at the time vs racism, and said something to the effect of it being like everyone staring at an ugly little mushroom and obsessing about how ugly it is while a huge monster is about to stomp on your town like Godzilla taking out Tokyo.
This is the mushroom. It’s ugly. Now let’s return our attention to the huge honking monsters.
I’m kind of with Atchka, it’s not really worth getting upset about. I hadn’t even heard of the site until there was this uproar about the 5000 people. And frankly, I don’t sympathize with these people. They decided to participate in a social site that is blatantly superficial, well, this is what they get.
You can’t really be mad at the staff of the website either. It’s not like they’re trying to hide the fact that their site is based solely off of societal ideal. And they aren’t exactly forcing guns to people’s heads to get them to sign up either. If there weren’t superficial people to be interested in such a site, the place would sink.
wow. That’s like all I can even say about this. wow.
I’m with Shannon and Trabb’s Boy on this one. The only thing that now bothers me is how websites in my own country are reporting about it, as if it’s worth it or a huge sensation. And I don’t even live in an English-speaking country. One of them actually started their article with the phrase: “The war on obesity continues”. That’s the real *facepalm* here, for me.
Idiocy. Everyone has their own idea of beauty. Even the herd of people who think that size matters, OK you like someone who is a size 3….but…what else? Skin color? Eye color? What if they happen to be a size three but are a triple amputee does that matter? What about if they happen to be a size three with no boobs? Big boobs? One boob?
It is just a site that markets what is publicly acceptable to acknowledge as beauty. Yeah, they are all beautiful but then so are we all. No matter our size, race, height, boob size or number.
Everyone is beautiful to someone. <3 They can narrow their views if they really want, I will enjoy my big fat broad ones and see more beauty than their shallow little brains could ever hope to see.
Oh my, it’s so interesting reading all these articles on this website – it feels like all of them are to manke fat people feel proud and defend their right to be fat!!!
You know what? You maybe right about that in the USA and some other countries where children leave parents alone and take them to some “centres” when they can no longer take care of themselves! Maybe this is OK for those people who live alone while their children are away and nobody sees them apart from their husband who got accustomed to their looks!
But in my country where children and parents live not far away from each other, where children take care of their parents and visit them often – in my country NOBODY – do you hear me? – NOBODY thinks fat is OK! And this is not because someone wants to hurt somebody’s feelings – no! It’s just we, chidren, have to deal with our parents overweight, and all the other problems connected to it – high blood pressure, thrombs, bad eyesight, heart diseases and so on. And we can see how our parents are not at all happy about all these problems. And we understand that if things are going this way – we are gonna lose aor parents early – instead of taking them to some trips or to the seaside – they always wanted to go there. And noone likes to take medicine every day, noone likes to check his or her blood pressure, noone likes to call the emergency in case something’s wrong with heart! And if nobody likes these things – how can you tell being fat is beautiful or normal or OK or your right! You have no right to suffer and make your children suffer! My mom and my MIL are fat – but they don’t think that’s OK! And they see how many problems overweight causes! And the see how much worry it takes us to help them!
YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO MAKE PEOPLE SUFFER!
Can you be any more ignorant? If you don’t like fat people – noone’s forcing you to. However, you, my dear, have no right to tell people how to live their lives. Noone’s coming to your house and magically turning you fat. Also, apart from the ridiculous statement that fat = suffering, what kind of bullshit is that “you have no right to suffer”? Are you also advocating arresting people, who are into rough sex? They suffer all right.
Eh. I can’t bring myself to care about the website. Everyone has a right to their own standards of beauty, even if it’s agressively conventional. That’s why I’m not bothered by the men on dating websites who set a height and weight range for women they will talk to. Yes, they are screening, but it’s a useful screening method for any prospective women.
It’s a private enterprise and they made their ethos very clear from the start. Snore. I think Kate Harding was right when she said there are more important issues facing fat people. Yawn.
My, the trolls are out. How exactly is the mysterious “YOU” making anyone suffer? I’ve read that comment from Valenta about three times and I’m still not entirely sure what she means.
Hi Valenta,
While it is true that obesity does come with certain health risks (heart disease, diabetes etc) it’s not a sure fire thing. Just being fat does not automatically mean that you will be riddled with these diseases. At the same time, it has been known for otherwise healthy people in their late twenties, early thirties who eat sensibly and exercise regularly to drop dead of a heart attack with no explanation. It is also true that someone who is middle aged, over weight and a smoker (a high risk category for heart disease and diabetes) to have no problems with blood pressure whatsoever. As it stands at the moment, scientists have no evidence for a causal link between obesity and these diseases, only a graph showing that obese people are more likely to suffer from them.
As a fat person myself i am well aware of these risks, as wel as the social stigma. You telling me it’s not okay to ‘defend my right to be fat’ is plain hurtful. I never asked to be fat. I have been overweight my entire life, despite being extremely active, eating lots of fruit and veg and rarely touching takeaway. I know that even if i were to lose a lot of weight, i will still never be what society calls skinny; i will still probably be classed as fat. People like you and the comments you’ve made give me no incentive whatsoever to lose the weight, because even if i do i am still a target for these comments.
I am a fat person, but I am also an adult. I know what i am, how to change it, and am willing to accept the consequences of not changing it. What i do not need is people telling me i have no right to be fat, or to try and learn to love myself for being fat. It’s people like you who are the reason i have next to no self esteem, and it’s people like you who have made it an absolute misery for me to be alive. Please, take your hurtful comments elsewhere and let me (and us, of others want to) defend our right to be fat, support each other through the actions we want or need to take and learn to love ourselves as we are.
Because if we can’t be happy when we’re fat, how could we ever hope to be happy when we’re skinny?
One of my favorite perks of being both fat and a bit frumpy is that people don’t want to be around me unless they like me. I don’t get hit on or fatuously flattered by people who only find self-worth in being popular. I think of it as my Shallow Filter and shudder to imagine living without it!
Therefore, I’m grateful to sites like that which give those people somewhere else to congregate with their own kind and make it easier for the rest of us to find each other.
Carry on, shallow people, carry on.
So, Valenta, I take it your country has replaced the Obesity Epidemic with a Righteous Indignation Epidemic?
Congratulations.
Peace,
Shannon
Beautiful People may remove those that have gained weight, but if beauty is too thin it is often associated with sexual dysfunction, painful vaginal intercourse, reduced libido and diminished lubrication. BP.Com may be producing a site for photos, not a site for people looking for human contact, relationships, love, tenderness and sexual satisfaction. Just a few healthy pounds gained from healthy eating and exercise can round a women in just the right places. The payoff is a beautiful person, eager for physical and emotional love, increased libido, and normal genital function, padding and lubrication.
I think this is such odd timing because I recently posted on my perils of on-line dating and how I think guys are not interested in my solely based on my body type. This is not to say that they all would love me, but before giving me a chance- I feel shot down because I’m fat. My post was mostly about annoyance with “code words” that guys use to weed out fat girls and how I wish they were just honest with what they are looking for…
But then came the news about beautifulpeople.com and my initial reaction was PISSED. But after thinking about it- isn’t that what I just blogged about? That I’d rather people be brutally honest even if it stings a bit at first? If you’re on that site- you’re superficial anyway and you’re looking for a superficial mate so you get what you deserve if you’ve now been kicked off because you don’t meet some superficial standard.
I think this is 100% a publicity stunt to garner attention for a site that is probably waning in popularity, if it ever had any. The inflammatory language (calling members fatties) plus the fact that there is no conceivable way the site knows who gained weight and who didn’t over the holidays are the tip-offs for me.
What’s the big deal here!? What business is this of anyone other than those wishing to join the site and find similar people?
OK, fattie is possibly a poor choice of word, but I myself am a member of BP, and ask anyone they certainly wouldn’t call me a “shallow, self-centered asshole”. That is sterotypical, and generalisation at its worst. I could say that those opposed to BP are all ugly and jealous, but I know this wouldnt true.
Take a chill pill people, and be more tolerant of others choices!
Christian, if you don’t think that the way the BP website is run is the business of anyone other than the members then why are you even here? Don’t you see that most of the people commenting really DON’T care about website? You are the one ranting about intolerance, not us.
Christian,
If you’re not a shallow, self-centered asshole, then why join a dating site that places such a high priority on physical beauty. Isn’t that the definition of shallow?
If you come on here to defend your membership on BP and declare “What business is this” to those who criticize your membership, then isn’t that the definition of self-centered?
And I think the asshole part is self-explanatory.
Peace,
Shannon
I blogged about this site yesterday. It’s appalling. I never thought about the idea of it all being a publicity stunt though, which I find very possible now that I think about it.
“Take a chill pill people, and be more tolerant of others choices!”
Ha! I don’t think you have much room for talking about tolerance.
i think i agree with beautifulpeople.com
this non-fat men or women image is a positive image of beautiful. not only beautiful but also healthy. you know, there are lot of health risk of being fat, such as diabetes, heart disease,…
this non-fat image will motivate peoples to cut of their fat. and i hope by doing regular exercise, eating healthy food…yeah, healthy life style…
and many health expert agree that being fat is not healthy!
Meanwhile, learn to spell.
Well, honestly, it makes sense that they would kick people out from a marketing point of view. They are trying to keep their site as elite as possible so that people want to sign up. The draw of wanting to be considered beautiful is irrepressible.
What I don’t understand is how they deemed some people to have ‘let themselves go’ – I know when I’m not looking my best (which is often ha ha) I don’t put bad pictures of myself on facebook. So I’m just wondering if these people put terrible pictures of themselves up or what?
Anyone can look terrible some of the time. My cousin is a model and I’ve seen some seriously crap pictures of her…
Anyways, I think it’s ridiculous that they kicked people of and sent them directions to a gym. I hate how much society puts pressure on people to look perfect all the time. It is not that big a deal if you gain 5 pounds.
My guess would be that this web site is losing business with the recession. In a desperate attempt to rake in the cash, they accept money from those fitness centers that they are referring the rejected members too. It is just one more marketing scam!
Pauli, you’re right – I have no right to tell people how to live their lives. But when these people have problems I have to care about – I not only have the right to tell them – I have the right to control them – especially when these people are my parents! (btw, my mom’s just started exercise 5 minutes every day – under my control – and she likes it!)And yes, noone comes into my house and tells me to be fat – but you care SO much about your privacy that you push people away from you – though sometimes a break-in is what we need to keep alive! The people I care about are fat – if they were practising rough sex, I would probably choose some other site:)
Lisette, there’s nothing mysterious about the YOU – it’s you. If you have children who care about you – ask them how they feel about you being fat, how they want to do everything to help you – and you realize what I mean. There’s nothing superbad about being fat – but your attempts to tell that “being-fattie-is-a-cutie” – are weird. Tonks said that being fat doesn’t make you unhappy – of course it doesn’t! And in some cases when you can do nothing about it – it’s the best way to behave – to accept what you can not change (like Tonks says). But if you haven’t or don’t even try to do so – don’t tell me that you’re OK! Plus while I was talking about sufferings I meant that you make suffer your relatives and children.
Tonks, of all the people who answered to my comment you’re the one that I respect the most – because you managed to explain some things that matter. But I can’t stop thinking that if I were your daughter – you wouldn’t choose to stay fat. And that this choice of yours is just the lack of support from your loving ones.
Who cares about being skinny?! God, I never told that. I never mentioned some stupid standard of the American society which citizens suffer from bulumia and anorexia because of that stupid standard! I don’t want you to become skinny – God, no! If YOUR NORMAL WEIGHT (given to you BY NATURE) doesn’t respond to the standards of your society – who cares? If you have big breasts and broad shoulders, and big butt – let it be! But if your body has to bear 40 kg over all the package I’ve described – that’s what I think isn’t OK. My mom is 155 cm, her weight is 96 kg – that is not ok. All she wants is to measure it to, like 76 kg – and that would be much better.
Tonks, I’ll take my comment elsewhere you want as long as you stop caring about society and begin to take care about yourself:)
Shannon, in my country there are not so many fat people – it’s not a societal problem. Maybe it’s because the amount of products you have in abundance, like those with E’s, GMO’s etc. are not so many, and because noone in our country (apart from students living in the dorms) eats soup out of a pack. We are not obsessed with the SKINNY standard (yet:)).
Valenta,
Can you at least tell us what country you’re from?
Peace,
Shannon
Valenta – I think you cannot speak for YOUR COUNTRY as a whole. Those are your personal views, but what you’re saying is incredibly hurtful. Who are you to decide that I’m making anyone in my family suffer? Don’t you think those things you’re carelessly writing here could have some terrible effects on the psychically weaker? Undermining of trust in your loved ones, for example.
Would you prefer your mom to be fat but happy and calm or making herself miserable over something she can’t change, drifting apart from you so that you don’t have to “suffer”?
Listen, from what I see and know, most fat people honestly CAN’T change the way they are. Could you imagine that someone would be willing to endure this kind of social stigma and hate and not change it if it was possible? Sorry, but
you’re really unfair.
Nobody is saying we all should go out and get fat. It wouldn’t even be possible. But if someone is, it’s not fair to push them away, especially if it’s your mom! It only adds to the stress and deepens the problem.
And I’m not from the USA, for the record. I’m from Europe.
Lolfatpeople