"Top 10 Subtle Ways To Tell Her She's Getting Fat"
Teghan sent along this link to an article on AskMen.com (and believe me, I feel gross about even giving them attention). It’s a list of “Top 10 Subtle Ways To Tell Her She’s Getting Fat.”
Well already, it’s a charming list. Feel free to spare yourself the pain to your eyeballs, since I will tell you that the list includes things like “Trick her into exercising,” and “Grab her love handles*” and “Buy her clothes that are too small**” and “Sabotage her chair.” Good grief.
*We can rename them “hate handles” just for these guys.
**Involves policing the size of her clothes and then somehow knowing what size she wears in which brand. Given the disparities in sizing from label to label, no man on earth could pull this off.
Here’s the worst one (bolding mine, indicating white-hot rage):
When dishing up meals for the two of you, try giving her smaller-than-usual amounts. By making her ask for more food, you might succeed in shaming her into an acknowledgment of her recent weight gain, and hopefully to instigate a conversation about what she’s going to do about it. If you feel as though you’re starving yourself in the process, remember you can always go back for more when she’s not looking.
Number one is to take her somewhere where she has to wear a bathing suit. Maybe this is the worst one:
If she seems content staying at home eating donuts in her track pants, why not start taking her to places where she has no choice but to where a swimsuit? As she awkwardly looks around at all the slender bodies having a great time, she’ll more than likely vow to do something about her recent weight gain.
Sure, you can only have fun if you’re skinny, and you are only fat if you sit around “eating donuts.” Now that is just downright lazy writing, if you ask me; there’s a trope that I would be happy to see die. And I can think of a number 11 for the list: “Make her read this article, which will cause her to throw up any food she’s eaten in the last few hours.”
Hey, where’s the list of “Top 10 Subtle Ways To Tell Him He’s A Jackass”?
Posted by mo pie
Filed under: Fatism, Feminism, Magazines, Sex & Romance
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Anyone else think we should send a response piece “Top 10 ‘SUBTLE’ Ways To Tell Him His Penis is Small”?
Sigh. I wish someone would take me on a vacation where I would have to wear a bathing suit. I’d love to sunbathe in nearly nothing and scare the crap out of children. Anyone know where I can get a string bikini in size 24?
I’m not kidding, I’d wear the thing and grin like an idiot at anyone who had a problem with it!
Ok, so who’s got advice for getting an even tan when you have fat rolls? There’s got to be a way.
What if her response to the chair breaking is to declare the chair a badly made piece of shit and deciding to redecorate? What then? What if she redecorates from Ethan Allen and gets all the furniture she’s been fantasizing about and instead of selling the old stuff she sits them on the curb? Including your favorite chair on the assumption that all of your stuff is crap?
Meh. Is a list of ten subtle ways to complain about the size and appearance a shallow guy’s penis? It’s good to know the mags for men are just as lame, useless and damaging as as the ones targeted at tha laydeez.
Elise: You can get bikinis form loveyourpeaches.com! No matter size you are, you should wear whatever bathing suit you want as long as it’s comfortable and makes you HAPPY!!
Um.. wow. That list is just so many kinds of horrible that I have trouble even believing that the guy who wrote it was being anything but sarcastic.
This is the most DISGUSTING article I have ever read. I say we all bombard AskMen.com with hate mail. Excuse me while I go puke now.
What terrible advice!
However, I don’t think it’s unresonable for a partner to request that I lose weight, if I have gained during the relationship and it gets in the way of intimacy. Not everyone finds fat attractive, just like not everyone finds thin attractive. Perhaps this is a moot point for a couple who are just dating, but if you’re part of a married couple, there is some sort of obligation try and remain attractive to your spouse (not just in terms of size, but dress, hygiene, goals, interests). People shouldn’t be getting married if they can’t commit to given the “best” of themselves to their relationship.
Elise – you’re talking to a fake-tanner here – which is probably not the advice you wanted? But it does have the benefit of being even!
Man, we have some lovely trolls here. You know, apparently there’s a city called Trollhatten, which makes me giggle. Maybe Mr. Women-Should-Be-In-The-Kitchen hails from there? I actually am in the kitchen with reasonable frequency, usually getting water or something to drink – my spouse can get his own food, much of the time, as we’re on different schedules. But I don’t suppose that’s what you meant.
Mostly in response to Schroedinger’s comment.
I don’t think you should marry a person if you expect them to always look the way they did when you married them. It’s not realistic. Expecting someone not to gain weight is a lot like expecting them not to get gray hair, or wrinkles, or maybe go bald.
Asking your partner to lose weight assumes that it’s a simple thing that they can just do. Some people can lose weight pretty easily. Other peoples’ bodies hang onto every pound, and they’d have to starve to get “thin.” This can be true even if they used to be thinner. Your metabolism does change throughout your life.
Marriage is “for better or for worse.” Part of that “better or worse” is that the other person will change. Definitely physically, probably mentally, emotionally, and spiritually too.
Elise, loveyourpeaches.com I wear my string bikini every day when I go swimming, I love it so much. And I wear a size 26-28.
To all those having the usual knee jerk reaction to dump the guy and call him an asshole I say more power to you. In fact, stay away from the guy and all other guys in general. Let them be deluded with thin women and such and let them be petty, superficial, etc with those women. Find someone just like yourself who is just as thin/fat and be happy and avoid the whole double standard.