Comments on: Can You Be Overweight, Yet "Truly Happy"?

By: Clarita

Clarita — Sat, 10 Jan 2009 01:58:57 +0000

My hapiness comes from my faith, God and prayer, which brings an inner peace that I am just the way God created me to be, and the future is bright.

By: Marie Denee

Marie Denee — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 07:26:33 +0000

So,
I have been a self proclaimed thick soul sista (like Sir Mix A Lot Quoted) for about … all my life! I have never been smaller than a 12 and have been upwards towards an 18. Right now, I sit at a proud size 16.
While I fall on the smaller side of plus, it took me a while to become comfortable in my skin, with my curves, and valuing my worth.
Once I got here, I have tried my best to share this with my friends, family, and customers. I have worked in retail for over ten years and have noticed that some women, regardless of size, tend to hate on thier body in some sort of way. I encourage them to accentuate the positive and disguise the others…

Keep up the amazing support and love for the CUrvy.COnfident.Chic. Plus size divas!

Marie Denee
The Curvy Fashionista

By: Laura

Laura — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 21:55:15 +0000

Great question. In order to be truly happy though, you have to be happy with yourself. If you are not it will reflect and people can see fakeness a mile away.
If you are not happy overweight you can not be happy skinny.

By: Cindy

Cindy — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 20:44:23 +0000

starting, I meant.

By: Cindy

Cindy — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 20:43:22 +0000

I’ve been working as a lay leader at my church for a fair bit, now. I just attended a training session where ordained men and women insisted that “it’s not your job to make people happy.”

That felt like a revolution. In life and in church, people will make it your dearest duty to Make. Them. Happy. Or else you’re a bad person, right?

In a sense, happiness is a byproduct of right-living. Except that it’s also not.

I’ve been thinking about happiness for a while now, and I’m strating to think I’ve been sold a bill of goods. First, everyone wanted me to be at *their* perfect weight so *I’d* be happy. Then, the marketplace kept blaring and bleating “buy this, buy that” and I’ll reach that happy place.

I enjoy life. A lot. But am I “truly happy?” Sister, please. No.

But so what? In the last three years I’ve learned that most of the opportunities in my life have grown out of conflict, risk and discomfort.

So maybe we should all just take a step back and realize that we don’t owe it to anyone — ourselves included — to be happy. We owe it to others and ourselves to learn how to *live right.* How to better nourish relationships. How to better recognize growing edges in conflict, risk and pain. How to treat others as if we *were” happy instead of acting like self-interested fuckwads until the Happy Nirvana Fairy pops us on the noodle with the Happy Shit Wand.

By: susan

susan — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 16:41:07 +0000

My happiness is tied to body size only in that some of the things that make me happy — exercising (but not overexercising), feeling energetic because I’m eating healthy foods, not being out of breath or having an aching back, not indulging in binges or overeating, etc — are all things that make me lose weight.

When I was very small, yes, I derived happiness from looking in the mirror and thinking I looked great. However, I had other issues in my life that caused me major stress and unhappiness. Now I look in the mirror and think I look okay, but my other issues are not a problem anymore so I am much happier.

By: Winter

Winter — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 05:36:14 +0000

I would give almost anything for the body image that many of you have described.

I’m not fat, by conventional terms. Or anybody’s terms except my own, really. For the past several years I’ve wrestled with depression, anxiety, self-injurious behaviors, and eating problems. The depression came before the food problems. But sometimes I feel that my self-esteem and everything that gets wrapped up in it just go in a never-ending circle with the depression.

Right now I can’t stand to look in a mirror, although sometimes I can’t look away. I call myself fat, obese, disgusting, selfish, a failure. I’m just above what BMI considers a “healthy” weight. But when I see myself, I don’t see healthy. I don’t see the potential or the vitality. I see fat, flab, and scars. I see somebody who doesn’t deserve to be loved or to be happy.

I’ve gotten quite off topic. Can overweight people be happy? Of course. The question is, why so many of us – regardless of weight – cannot seem to be?

By: Ana

Ana — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:43:36 +0000

As I’m in the midst of therapy kicking my ass, and I can, with a 100% degree of certainty, that my sadness/not feeling comfortable doesn’t come from the fact that I’m fat.
And at this moment, that’s good enough for me.

By: Herbal Remedies Girl

Herbal Remedies Girl — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:42:00 +0000

I know many people who are overweight and happy. I think that as long as you are happy with yourself and healthy, being slightly overweight will not have that much of an impact on your happiness.

By: Phatchik

Phatchik — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 19:54:34 +0000

I just found your blog today and I. LOVE. IT! I found it through uppercasewoman (who I also love!) and I can’t believe how relevant this post is to my life right now.

This weekend I struggled to find things that made me feel happy and all I could focus on was how unhappy my weight made me. How maybe, just maybe, I would be happy if I could be thin. Man, being thin would just cure all my problems! But my logical side knows the truth. Anyway, this blog made me feel so much better…I’m NOT alone!