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More Wacky Celebrity Diets

June 13th, 2008

Now you too can diet like a celebrity, using everything from cayenne pepper to colonics in order to “detox” your body and lose weight. Yummy!

Martha’s Vineyard Detox Diet: Followers include ridiculously skin-and-bones supe Gisele Bundchen, weight loss master Robin Quivers and the muscular Madonna. The 21-day detox promises devotees to shed 21 pounds in that many days “by subsisting on live juices, enzymes – and regular colonics.”

Master Cleanser: Reportedly what Beyonce used in order to nab her Dreamgirls role, Vince Vaughn allegedly follows the lemon juice liquid diet, and Jared Leto shed his Chapter 27 weight by drinking the “water mixed with lemon, maple syrup and cayenne pepper” cocktail as well.

Joshi’s Holistic Detox: Fans include the clavicle-flashing Gwyneth Paltrow, original waif Kate Moss and currently slim Ralph Fiennes. The main focus is avoiding acidic and toxic foods, but the downside hardly sounds worth it, and sort of explains Kate’s moody expressions in photo after photo: “Users report headaches, stomach pains, nausea and fatigue.”

Follow the link for pictures of the skinny celebs. Post here to answer Defamer’s question, “is giving up our nightly vino and succumbing to regular colonics worth looking like a lollipop head?” One of the profound questions of our age.

Posted by mo pie

Filed under: Celebrities, Gwyneth Paltrow, Tidbit, Weight Loss

24 Responses to “More Wacky Celebrity Diets”

  1. sunrise, on June 13th, 2008 at 9:28 am Said:

    eww colonics! I don’t think I could ever put a hose up my butt and let some machine do it’s work on my rear end!!

    i dont think any of this crap is healthy in the long run….

  2. Bree, on June 13th, 2008 at 10:06 am Said:

    I’m with you sunrise. Being the fattie that I am, I’d rather eat a lollipop than have a lollipop head.

  3. Alyssa, on June 13th, 2008 at 10:42 am Said:

    Definitely NOT worth it! These folks are gonna have so many health issues later if they keep up with this.
    Colonics? They remind me too much of stomach flu. No thanks! (And what a job to have! Who the heck decides that they want a career draining other people’s colons?)

  4. mccn, on June 13th, 2008 at 10:47 am Said:

    And isn’t the whole point of our bodies that they know what they’re doing? If we needed colonics, we never would have made it this far.

    Cayenne pepper and maple syrup? Ewwww. Now, cayenne pepper on a nice tuna steak, maybe. ..

  5. thordora, on June 13th, 2008 at 11:02 am Said:

    I have a friend who contends that if I did the master cleanse I wouldn’t be fat OR bipolar.

    While she has massive panic attacks, the shakes and stomach pain so severe she can’t leave her bed at time.

    I’ll take fat and crazy ftw thanks.

  6. HONI, on June 13th, 2008 at 11:22 am Said:

    hmm. not into colonics or however u spell it.. Heck I am even dreading my first colonoscopy one day .. so thats not my deal… uhmmm I think fat is where its at.. in this case… LOLLIPOP head.. I love it..lol…

  7. lisa-marie, on June 13th, 2008 at 1:39 pm Said:

    That Master Cleanse makes you stink – I know someone who’s done it and I could hardly stand to be around them!

  8. AndyJo, on June 13th, 2008 at 1:46 pm Said:

    Hmm… “Users report headaches, stomach pains, nausea and fatigue.”

    I saw a poster in a clinic once that served low-income patients. It’s title “Are you Hungry?”. Some of the symptoms…

    * Headaches
    * Stomach pains
    * Nausea
    * Fatigue

    Coincidence? Ya think????

    –Andy Jo–

  9. Emily, on June 13th, 2008 at 5:17 pm Said:

    Alyssa~ My old neighbors sister did colonics!! That was her JOB. For Celebrities. I would do that job but ONLY because she made craploads of money and lived in Hawaii and traveled around to celebrities butts.

    I think a cleanse is ok if you are just trying to clear out your system (bowels, colon, stomach) and trying to get the CRAP out and start healthy. But it only takes like 2 days to get your freaking bowels clean people…..NO NEED FOR A “CLEANSE” diet.

  10. Charlotte, on June 13th, 2008 at 8:22 pm Said:

    All three of those diets sound like miserable ways to live. Someone tell those people to stop torturing themselves!

  11. Wise Women Coffee Chat » “Weighting” for Summer Fun, on June 14th, 2008 at 6:40 am Said:

    [...] actually spent some time on). It looks at how weight is portrayed in pop culture, everything from crazy celebrity diets to the story of a Starbucks’ barista trying to fatten up the Olsen twins by sneaking full-fat [...]

  12. Mindy, on June 14th, 2008 at 8:21 am Said:

    Reminds me of Dr. Hazzard diet — http://www.starvationheights.com/ . Yikes!

  13. amy, on June 14th, 2008 at 1:54 pm Said:

    I’,m strictly macrobiotics and I’ve done dr. joshi’s it’s the most amazing feeling..it lets you just release bad food… it’s easy, no processed sugar-candy, no red meat-steak, no complex carbohydrates like pasta or bread, that’s it 21 days try it

  14. Lime, on June 14th, 2008 at 2:35 pm Said:

    Amy, I’m curious as to what you might mean by ‘release bad food.’ Food doesn’t have any particular moral value; and your body turns it into energy, stored fat, or waste whether society deems it ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ I’ve never seen the term ‘release’ used in regards to food, except after a night of heavy drinking. Do enlighten us, please!

  15. Brittney, on June 14th, 2008 at 10:34 pm Said:

    I remembered Beyonce explaining her diet on Oprah. It was kind of her decision, supposedly because the original Dreamgirl she’s playing as was a very thin girl and she wanted the movie to be as genuine as possible. But once the movie was done, she went back to her usual… stuff. (whatever that is)

  16. Cyn, on June 15th, 2008 at 2:09 pm Said:

    Mo Pie, get rid of the trolls, please.

    Didn’t Jared Leto develop gout problems after the Master Cleanser? Of course, he blames it on the weight gain.

    I remember once seeing an E! special on Giselle Bundchen where she swore she has never been to a gym, she was naturally “gifted” with thinness and kids used to laugh at her when she was a little girl and they used to call her Olive Oyl.

  17. Jackie, on June 15th, 2008 at 10:18 pm Said:

    In response to Defamer’s question, nooooo…

    Also, I think Jared Leto would look sexy at any size, as long as he wears the guyliner.

  18. Pamela R, on June 16th, 2008 at 11:36 am Said:

    Watching celebs is how people get the wrong idea about how to lose weight! As a matter of fact, watching what celebs do may be the downfall of the free world! LOL I hope you know this comment isn’t aimed at the blog, it’s aimed at the celebs!

  19. Erin @ The Skinny Gourmet, on June 16th, 2008 at 2:12 pm Said:

    Ahh lollipop head. What we all strive for eh?

    I have heard all these zen type reactions to detox diets, but I always find myself wondering if it isnt just the last throes of a starved mind, something akin to hallucinating in a sensory deprivation chamber.

    I’m game for eating a reasonable amount of food, from a reasonable variety of sources, try to get some old fashioned nutrition without the new hyped fads, making moderate and liveable changes, and eating food that tastes good.

  20. StartsWithAnX, on June 16th, 2008 at 2:27 pm Said:

    What about the Binge and Purge diet? I hear that one works pretty well.

  21. Cindy, on June 16th, 2008 at 2:30 pm Said:

    The body is cleansing itself on a regular basis. That would be the purpose of the kidneys, bowels and skin.

    It does not and has not generally needed potions, enemas and the like.

  22. cowshark, on June 16th, 2008 at 2:37 pm Said:

    Every time I hear about these detox diets and colonics, I have to wonder: how have we humans been able to survive for so long with all this “poison” food and toxins just hanging around in our bodies? Oh, if only we had organs that could filter out that nasty stuff…like, say, a liver, or kidneys. Pity we don’t.

  23. pennylane, on June 17th, 2008 at 11:43 am Said:

    I have giardia right now and it is one hell of a cleanser. Perhaps I could write a book. You are one parasite away from your ideal weight!

  24. Liza, on June 18th, 2008 at 7:05 am Said:

    I’m just playing devil’s advocate, cowshark, but thousands of years of our predecessors didn’t have processed crap like McDonald’s in their systems.

    I’m not promoting crazy shit like this, of course. I’m promoting eating a balanced and healthy diet with natural foods and getting regular exercise. Not drinking pepper juice and having your ass vacuumed out.

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