I don’t know. I’ve had enough willpower to get two degrees, progress in my career, quit smoking, quit a bad man, drive cross country by myself, and do lots of other things, but apparently it takes more willpower than I possess to lose weight.

Since she buttressed what I’ve long suspected — and since she’s ripped to shreds despite it, or perhaps because of it — I’ve decided to believe her for the time being.

So I try to avoid the issue by arranging my life so I don’t meet temptation – but some might say that requires willpower… To me, it’s a different kind of thinking. I still don’t think it’s worth beating myself up for the willpower I don’t have, though.

It’s just what Rosemary Grace said, above. Work smarter, not harder. I have a husband like Quirky’s, who doesn’t get tempted by bad foods, and he does our food shopping (not really for that reason, but it helps).

Another thing I find helpful is to plan the day’s (or week’s) meals when I’m not hungry, or even just well in advance, because then it’s all theoretical and I don’t have to make spur-of-the-moment choices.

It’s not a perfect system, but then any deviations from the plan have to be conscious decisions, not automatic…

We’re all different, we all have different ways in which we’d like to change our lives (not all to do with health, obviously) so we’re just going to have to find what works for us. Never mind if someone else thinks it’s not the way to do it.

Depression is a sign that someone suffers from a tendency towards negative thoughts, willpower alone will not break the habit if negative thinking, retraining is necessary. Willpower might help a depressive sign up for therapy and attend the first session or two despite desperately wanting to curl up in a corner and hide from the world, but it won’t take the place of figuring out that person’s triggers and pitfalls, and addressing ways to improve things.

The same thing goes for sustainable weight loss. Willpower, or something like it, will get you to walk through the door of the gym to sign up, despite fear of being fat and out of place, but willpower will not keep you going regularly, setting up your day to facilitate making it to the gym will get you there more often than willpower. No matter how much I tell myself it’s important to get to the gym, if I have no food at home and need to do laundry I will go to the grocery store, then go home. If I have planned ahead and have stuff ready to go in the fridge, I will go to the gym knowing I have food ready to eat when I get done, and clean clothes to wear to work the next day.

Today I will buy an overpriced underhealthy lunch, because I have not been organized enough recently to have lunches ready to grab from the fridge when I leave for work in the morning. I will exercise a little willpower over the weekend to make sure I plan and prepare food for the week, but after that it’s autopilot all the way baby!

Perhaps my attitude towards willpower and weight loss could be summed up as “Work smarter, not harder”. Judiciously apply willpower where it will help you get set up for daily good habits to be easier. Don’t waste energy fighting with yourself daily, it only leads to self loathing.

As Winston Churchill once said “sometimes it is not enough to do your best; you have to do what you know is right” (or something to that effect).

I know that I’m at the point in my weight loss where I just DO things without thinking about them. I exercise regularly. I don’t have to force myself. it’s just like brushing my teeth. I make healthy choices because it is instinctive. Apart from the occasional PMS-induced pizza binge, etc. most of my healthy living stuff, while initially involved willpower, now is just a matter of course because I’ve intellectualized it down to the level where I’m very conscious of how my body and mind feel AFTER the choices are made (ie, junk food and sloth = junk feelings & general depression; healthy food & exercise = feel great, sleeping great, looking great, etc)

In reviewing the comments that have been made so far, I am also wondering if there’s some kind of difference between the willpower required to go to work, brush your teeth, not attack somebody, etc. and the specific kind that would be required to achieve and maintain a weight loss, just because it’s food that you’re trying to control, you need it to survive, and your body has a powerful interest in making sure it gets enough nourishment. I still really think it’s more complex than “weight loss is hard and you have to try harder if you want to succeed.” Not that I don’t think that’s true–more like it’s probably necessary but not sufficient for weight loss. Of course you’ve heard me say I’ve never succeeded at long-term weight loss, so take my “knowledge” with a grain of salt.

I may feel a strong urge to attack someone. So might my dog. I, on my own, will consider the consequences and not allow myself to attack. My dog goes for the throat.

Similarly, with eating, if I consider the consequences of this or that, I make a decision. It may be a harder decision than the skinnier lady down the street. I may suffer more than she. However, I am capable of making the decision. The dog eats whatever it can get until it feels satisfied. It would never put itself on a diet of any kind.

I can educate myself about healthy foods, exercise habits, sleep habits, etc. etc. etc. and implement that knowledge to better my health. I might decide it’s not worth it! But I can do it. The dog can’t.

Beautifully stated.

I had a discussion with a friend a few weeks ago where I tried to explain this very concept. She was expressing disgust at the eating habits of some “very fat” neighbors of hers (I guess I qualify as one of the “good” fatties?), so I asked her why she DIDN’T eat as much as they did. Why did she stop eating? Was it willpower? She said it would make her sick to eat that much.

So I pointed out that there must be some reason why it made her feel sick, while her neighbors were compelled to keep eating. I lacked your succinctness, but I think she got the point.