“Everyone wants to be as attractive as possible to the opposite sex.”

I know you already know this, but I have to remind you.

No. Not everyone wants to be as attractive as possible to the opposite sex. As a gay woman, I probably wouldn’t notice until three days after every man fell off the planet. Not because I hate them, but because they mean very, very little to me. My attractiveness to men is not a willful fact of my life. It is to some MEN, and occasionally, a man might feel the need to make his appraisal of my sexual attractivess known.

To slam this point again: I could not care less if I ever gave any man a boner. (Because that’s what you’re talking about here.) Ever.

I do want to be as attractive as possible to my mate. And wonder of wonders, weight isn’t the top of the list for her. Just like it isn’t for a number of heterosexual men.

I merely meant that we see a lot of hate directed towards us and it would feel good after dealing with a troll to see them say something similar to that.

I meant no disrespect.

I’m actually not sure how small my body is meant to be; my mom also encouraged me to diet from a young age so I’m not sure how I would have turned out given a good selection of healthy food and no dieting as a kid. I’m thinking probably size 14-ish but I’m not sure. My Weight Watchers goal weight would probably put me into a 10 or so, but if I start to have a terrible time losing before I get to that point, I’m planning to bail or at least step back for a bit, stick with the good habits I have managed to develop so far, and not try to tighten down on it too hard. I’d definitely rather weigh 180 than 275 (my start weight) and I’m afraid working too hard to get past that to “goal” would send me down a counterproductive path. I’m kind of interested to see where I level out, actually. If I can get to goal without being too restrictive, so much the better.

I tend to believe people can lose weight in some cases, but the mistake comes in when they take extreme measures to get past a point where their bodies want to go–whatever that point might be. But I honestly know next to nothing about this. I would hate to think I’m an authority, even on how my own body works because I’m only starting to learn.

Anyway, thanks for the interesting discussion and good luck.

That’s what I wish every hate-spewing troll would say…

You know your own body, so if you feel it would be unhealthy to try to slim down drastically, you are the judge of that. I know what it is like to be told you don’t meet a certain standard, so I should know better than to do it to other people. I won’t interfere anymore.

But in answer to the question you actually asked… yes, of course I wonder what it would be like to be Very Slim. So slim that nobody could ever realistically say that I needed to lose another pound. So slim that nobody could ever find my appearance wanting. Although that’s the problem, right? People will always find something else to judge and criticize if I give them the power to decide whether my body is acceptable. Just look at people criticizing Katie Holmes’s “cellulite” or whatever on web sites and it becomes clear you can never win. (Plus I’m an “ancient” 30 so I’d be screwed anyway.) The main thing I envision if I got to that 20 BMI is feeling an overwhelming sense of relief that people would no longer feel entitled to judge my body. But of course they would anyway.

I’m obviously not going to try what you suggest, because I don’t think it’s a good or healthy idea for a host of reasons (and when all was said and done, I doubt it would be possible for me without near-starvation… my body isn’t meant to be that small), but yeah, of course I wonder what it would be like to be a size 2 or whatever. I wish I didn’t, but I do. Would I take that magic pill if someone offered it to me tomorrow and if it were safe? Heck yeah.